All Tangled Up
To The Dominate Ones
I regret to inform you that I am experiencing flash backs. Hard ones, the ones that leave a knot in your throat.
I know I seem innocent to the readers and for that I chuckle. I am no more innocent as the reader is. I have a haunted past and as I have gotten older I have let loose of most of my more younger year life style. I was one of the lucky ones, opportunity of being in the right place at the right time has always seem to be my fortune.
What I really want to say is this..I lost my Master a few years back. I mourn for him to this day. I don't know how to fix the void I have. Like a hole in my heart. I cannot look for a new Master because I was binded to my jealous Master and was never released of my duties to him. My last command was that I would never look for a Master, but if I was captured and beat down to bow before a new Master, I would be released of my everlasting promise.
All these feelings I am having are because of a diary I found of this man whom claims he is 100% Dom. Whether he is or not isn't really the issue. The fact is I was fine until I started reading his diary and it made me think. Did my Master ever write about being a Dom? Did he post things about me or my ever dying love and submission to him? Would I be proud or ashamed of what he would of or did say about me? Would he mention my scar he left by biting me and ravishing my body? I shiver with pleasure at that.
We had a very strict relationship, with special moments as well. I knew I was not his only sub, but I was the most frequently used. I was convenient and very loyal. Doms don't usually fall in love with their Subs. That is the plan. But that doesn't make it true. Things happen, people respond the way you want them too, you feel superior and you control your subs and make them feel what you want them to feel, act the way you want them to act, and say what you want them to say. Its pretty simple living actually. I never had to think, he thought for me.
When my Master died, he left this world and left behind a wife, children, and several subs. I didn't know his other subs but at the funeral there were several women that sat silently and seem not to fit the family group. I did fit in because I was his wife's assistant. I was always around her and my Master.
She and I are still friends even after all these years. She has no idea about my relationship with her husband and she never will. I guess what makes it easier for me is that she and I are mourning the same man together and she has no clue.