Sorry diary, I have been incommunicado for such a long time.
So much has been happening that I can’t possibly write all in one seating.
My divorce is more or less a done deal. The final papers should be ready in the courts now so it is just a matter of her requesting it but I reckon she would only request after the court case for financial arrangement. This is going ahead sometime in September. She requested for a waiver to do mediation (as it is mandatory before applying to court) because apparently she is a victim of domestic abuse! It makes my stomach turn that she can descend and stoop to such disgusting depth but I have learnt to lower my expectations of her. The irony of all this is that my niece who stayed with us has now left because they had altercation, and my niece called the cops to accuse her of assault. My niece has left and I have lost contact with her (she cut everybody off). When my ex (I call her this now) was in police custody and she then got bail and had to go through interview I for some reason was supportive in my little way. I guess may be because of the children. I just can’t help thinking if the roles were reversed she would have ensured I was prosecuted but my actions are principles are not based on what she does or capable of doing. We at least communicate now, although I have minimised the level of communication as it is all pretence and I don’t do that. I can’t be talking and laughing to someone who is trying to destroy me and maligning my character everywhere.
My sister who lives with us with her daughter is moving out imminently, I am a bit nervous about that because the silence between both of us will become more glaring to the children. My sister also helps implicitly to diffuse the tension in the house. Having said that I am not sure how long I will be there for. I will definitely move out after the financial arrangements. On the children’s arrangement I have made an offer to her which she has agreed to. I just need t formalise that with my solicitor and she will withdraw the nonsensical case she applied for in court for child custody (again as a victim of domestic abuse).
My business is actually ok. I have been moving it along somehow with little or no money. I am so frustrated because of my lack of funds. I can see it taking off if I have the funds. My private finance is not any better. I am not sure how I am going to get out of the financial dilemma I am in but I am just ploughing away. It makes me sad that I may not achieve all I am capable of because of lack of finance. I am still praying…..