missing

memories
2014-07-22 21:01:42 (UTC)

you don't want to hear it

1-720-522-6489
How can i justify being sober when i keep having to call into work because im puking and having headaches??
22 Jul 2014, 04:40PM

Nate
You still doing it occasionally?
22 Jul 2014, 04:42PM

1-720-522-6489
I kept slipping up...its been almost two weeks now.
22 Jul 2014, 04:43PM

1-720-522-6489
I shouldn't still be feeling this bad!!!
22 Jul 2014, 04:43PM

1-720-522-6489
I am depressed as hell, sleep way too much, i wanna eat but theres not really a lot of food to eat which just makes me wanna go back to it. At least then I got things done went to work and if I didn't have food wasn't a big deal
22 Jul 2014, 04:45PM

Nate
U need to eat right. That will make a world of difference. Use the money for that crap.on healthy food
22 Jul 2014, 04:46PM

1-720-522-6489
If i had money for crap i probably would have spent it on food. We get paid by the family but our checks come in every 3 weeks with my bills being paid I don't have much money left over afterwards.
22 Jul 2014, 04:48PM

1-720-522-6489
I dont get to get cigs because i can barely afford them. Yet another reason i want to say screw it. I cant survive off the shit so why not do it and go under?
22 Jul 2014, 04:49PM

Nate
Well what u have don't blow it on that shit!!! You won't ever get anywhere on it
22 Jul 2014, 04:50PM

1-720-522-6489
Hell at least people will give me that! No one wants to buy me a meal or pack of smokes but they'll hand me death
22 Jul 2014, 04:51PM

1-720-522-6489
Im miserable. I keep feeling really suicidal. Oh wow. I keep praying... that's the only thing i have left. Prayer
22 Jul 2014, 04:52PM

Nate
Not for free
22 Jul 2014, 04:52PM

1-720-522-6489
Yea they will. Because the point is they get you hooked and then you have to keep going back and then that's when they start asking for things
22 Jul 2014, 04:53PM

1-720-522-6489
Which is when i walk away but still...im sorry for taking up your time. Thank u for talking to me
22 Jul 2014, 04:53PM

Nate
Just stay away from those people. They're not your friends
22 Jul 2014, 04:55PM

1-720-522-6489
I have no friends. Im not ok. And everyone is ok with that
22 Jul 2014, 04:55PM

1-720-522-6489
Didnt mean to bug you either
22 Jul 2014, 04:56PM

Nate
You need to lose the negative attitude and find more positive people to hang out with
22 Jul 2014, 05:02PM

1-720-522-6489
Yep. Cause i apparently am able to do that. If im not at work im asleep or trying desperately to stay awake to do things that need to be done in the day. I dont see a point in any of this anymore.
22 Jul 2014, 05:04PM

1-720-522-6489
Im sorry but i dont think i want to keep trying. In general. No one will really notice if i left anyway. As i said i have no friends. I have no one. Thanks for taking your time to deal with my bullshit i appreciate the effort. Take care
22 Jul 2014, 05:06PM

Nate
Don't know what to tell you that I haven't already a hundred times
22 Jul 2014, 05:07PM

1-720-522-6489
Yea. Its ok. Its not your problem to deal with anyway so i really do appreciate you talking to me but i think my life is at its breaking point...guess i kinda thought thered be more people who cared who would want me to be better
22 Jul 2014, 05:10PM

1-720-522-6489
Its not really motivating to know the one person who will talk to me is the one that left me.
22 Jul 2014, 05:11PM




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