The Anonymous Writer

The Journal With No Name
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2014-03-06 23:40:22 (UTC)

Filling the gap from 4/28

Yeah, so I could totally write to you about what happened to me today orrrrr I could just skip all of that because who actually gives a damn and I can just catch you up on what you've missed these past 11 months :-)

I have the best common sense, I know.
I'm still going to catch my meddling souls up to date by telling pretty much what happened to me for the last year... well mostly myself so that when I look back onto this hidden website I can see how far I've progressed. I mean if you saw my second to last entry, you could tell I was in a pretty funky, dark dog. I mean fog. At this point of my life, I'm making a lot of dumb mistakes. My brain just isn't processing things correctly. Personally, I blame high school for this. It all started a few months into this freshman year that I've grown to be dum. I mean dumb.
_______________________________________________
High school is literally the mirror of society. I'm constantly surrounded by what the media portrays everybody and everything.

Unfortunately most of what media portrays isn't anything "brainy," so I'm surrounded by bimbos and unfortunately syncing with their brain waves. It's becoming quite a problem. I'm getting Ds and Fs on math tests now. I try to study, but something just isn't clicking. Even my grade in spanish is starting to sink faster than congress' approval rating. I know I am not dumb. I just have a hard time pushing myself AND THEN achieving academically.

Media also doesn't target high school teens with politics as much as wrinkly adults who like to shout nonsense to sound impressive. This is why it's hard to find anybody in my school interested in politics like I am. I joined congressional debate, so I mean hey there is a start! I met a few people and I fell absolutely in love with it. It's not enough. I lost Esther because she felt like we couldn't be friends anymore since I couldn't be like, "OHH GLITTER AND VICTORIA'S SECRET MODELS AND LYING TO MAKE PEOPLE FEEL BETTER AND BEING ACCEPTED BY FAKE, RICH PEOPLE IS SO UBER RAD!!" We still talk, but it's not how it used to be. Everybody was shocked by that. Her dad, who I play tennis with, tells me we will get back together. She seems worse off actually, but it will never be the same. Speaking of things never being the same, I haven't mentioned Shirley yet.

I should start off with saying that the media is excited by people like Miley Cyrus who do erotic things to get attention. Shirley is one of those people. Also like Miley Cyrus, Shirley isn't widely accepted by our high school. She is still too much for people to handle. I'm nice to her now. It's not like we will ever be friends again, but we've had some crazy nights out before. (It's called politics. I'm running for student body prez.)

I never will have another crazy night out again though. At least not with Shirley and not out and about in a college area. I say this because Esther's dad found out. (Let's just say he parties like a true Serbian.) Although he won't tell my dad because he doesn't really give a shit. He ultimately wants to make sure I don't get into trouble with my tennis coach and/or lose a scholarship. He is a pretty cool guy. It's also because I felt like the scum of the earth when I had to call my crush to drive us home.

Let me explain a little about him first.
He is the student body president; It has reigned in his family. He is my neighbor. He is tall and smart and mature. He knows everybody, I mean everybody, like he can wave to 30 people he knows within a 10 minute car ride. The downfalls to him are he is a senior and he is my newly made friend's brother. Anyway, let's call him Shawn.

Shawn, even though his sister claimed he was in a bad mood, picked us up anyway. It wasn't that far of a drive, but on a Saturday night it's a little obnoxious to pick up some freshmen girls. Especially when one of the girls is named Shirley who you are trying to avoid. When he picked us up, he seemed himself. I was drunk so it's not like I can process things clearly. I felt like the car ride was fine. I mean he let me play my music like he was testing my musical tastes and we talked the whole time with no awkward pauses. I would say there was sexual tension the way we were talking.. and the way I left the car pausing and him pausing and us just staring. I would say that, but I would be a liar. (Or perhaps an aggressive dreamer.) Everything was perfect, but I mentioned my sister and he knew her. And when he admitted how he thought she was cute... my drunk ass knew it wasn't going to happen. (I mean besides the whole senior and friend's brother situation... it wasn't going to happen.) So uh, you may be thinking where I started feeling scummy, huh? Well, it started with the realization that my idol who I probably romanticize because he is the opposite sex just picked me up at one of my lowest points. Ew. Let's not further dwell.

Ew. Yeah let's not dwell on this anymore. Carry on.

Uh, I quit tennis. Well, first I made it to varsity tennis as a freshman. I went from being number 3 to number 1 and then number 2 when Carol came back from an injury. It's a big deal considering my age. I just hated the fact that I wasn't making progress and so I quit. I realized I needed the sport in more ways than to get into college though so I joined back. It was FRUSTRATING point of my life. Everybody was beating me... even the younger girls.. ew. Let's not further dwell. This is because ultimately I worked hard and persevered to get where I am. I'm at a point where if I just go into more tournaments I can still be on track to a good tennis career. I'm thinking of going to Ole Miss maybe. That's my target, at least.


Anyway, I promise you there is a lot of exciting things that has happened. I'm just too tired to type it all out as enthusiastically as possible. Just wait for tomorrow!! Sasha is coming into town and both of my parents will be out of the house for the weekend :-)

Seriously,
Brooke Something

P.S. So much for staying concise. Hehe. Whoops!
P.S.S. Any ideas on how to start a revolution like MLK, but with feminism? Idk. It would just be helpful. I thought I might as well ask.


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