☣PYROMANIAC☣

✖✖Playing With Matches✖✖
2014-03-06 00:43:13 (UTC)

Thread

I woke to the darkness of my room.
I could hear shuffling beyond my door.
I turned over.. hoping it wasn't morning yet.
I was still so tired.

It's always so cold in the bathroom.
I don't have time to step into the shower, but I have to stand outside it and stick my head under the flowing water to wash my hair.
By the time I'm finished.. the room is warm.. and then I have to go out into the colder hall and bedroom.

I noticed I started my period today.
I looked in the cabinet.
No pads.
I'm so irregular that it slips my mind that I even have a period.. but when I start.. it makes up for being gone so long.
I never used to suffer with it.
Now I do.

I put on my new shirt.
I went to the kitchen.
My grandma saw it.
She asked where I got it.
I had to tell her the truth.
I told her I gave Gabby the money to buy three shirts.
She wasn't happy.
She got mad because I sent a guy to buy me shirts.
She said it was embarrassing to ask a guy to by a girl clothes.
She asked why I didn't ask her to take me to the store and buy them.
I screamed inwardly.
I didn't ask her to take me because she never would have let me pick out the shirts I wanted.
All three Gabby picked out were guys graphic Ts.
I knew he would do it for me, and that he would pick out awesome ones.
I wanted guy shirts. I figured out how to get them. I payed for them myself.

I was a little depressed when I got to school.
I sleep the entire bus ride.
Al wasn't there, so suruh went to the computer lab and T left the library to meet someone.. so I was alone.
I went to look for a book.
I've needed books for awhile.. my hunger to read has grown stronger.
I finally found two books that looked decent.
I brought them up to the desk.. and the lady told me I owed 1.30
Every time I try to check out a book, they tell me I owe money.. and the last time I owed something, it was payed for, and I haven't checked out a book since.
So she said she'd hold the books for me so long as I bring the money tomorrow.

I go to first block.. and the test that I took yesterday.. I made a 77 on. The first C I've made in my Math class.. after I promised myself I'd do better.. that I was so tired of C averages.. Tests are weighted differently than other grades.. and so my average will be affected greatly.. and the nine week cut off isn't far away..
I just wanted to curl up and fade away.

Second block.. it was hard to focus.
I found myself staring off..
It took a lot of will power to finish my assignments.

Third block was better.
My friends were with me, and we didn't do busy work.
Lunch was okay..

Fourth Block came.. and I tried to build my clay pot as high and straight as I could.. because I only have two days to finish and I still have to make it look like a famous painting with 3D physical features.. Next week I have to finish two wheel thrown pieces.

I started writing this entry in an actual notebook today.. because I haven't written in so long.. I go through random phases where I write a lot.. and not at all..
This diary is one of my few threads that keep me together.

Ta Ta for now.
~LoveStruck</3




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