cells

Ragdoll Princess
2014-02-24 16:47:52 (UTC)

LOVE SUCKS

I was afraid to say, I fell in love for real in a guy named Lucio. Yeah, right, this is another man I met on a site called tagged. I know, it's really delusional to find true love on that forsaken site, but, I haven't expected this man. This is the story: Because I was so upset about an asshole I called Muffin I made a decision to cancel my account there. It's says; I can cancel it permanently, but I found out that you can still retrieved the account if you know your password. So, I did cancel my account, but later retrieved it because I need to give a final message to Muffin, because I remembered that I gave him my naked photo, not exposing my face. I was just not thinking when I did send him my photo via skype transfer, I just remembered that, it might affect my reputation, so I hurriedly message him on tagged because I already deleted him on skype and I can only reach him on tagged. By the time that I messaged him, I know that my growing feelings for him was not intense anymore, which is a good thing, because I finally waken up in my stupidity in falling in love in a wrong guy, but, I was wrong, because now, I was falling in love again in a man from tagged, this time, an Italian guy, who named Lucio.
He was just one of the tagged men who are messaging me, but his messages are mostly, how are you? and mostly telling his travels. I get bored on him because he keep on telling his travel and I was not that interested because by the time I have his message I was kind of falling to Muffin and all I want at that time is to receive a message to him. So I just read his message and read that he was been here in Bangkok and some neighbor countries like Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia. Okay, let's move on to make this story short; Because I was upset about the asshole Muffin, I sent all from tagged who gave message this : SORRY...YOU CAN NOT SEE ME AGAIN HERE BECAUSE I CANCEL MY ACCOUNT ALREADY. THANK YOU AND TAKE CARE! SEE YOU IN THE FUTURE! and that was the time he asked for my fb and I gave it to him. We exchanged messages for almost a month and a half after finally decided to meet in person. We don't have much time to know each other better, so he decided to meet me again on the 13th and I spent three nights on his place, he was my first ever date on Valentines day and the one who got my virginity. I have memories being with him, we cried together, dined together, sleep together, watched endless movie together, kissed together on our 3 nights somewhere in Bangkok and promised to not forget like lovers, but all just end after three days with him, because he said on my face: "I don't say that I love you, I said; I like you." OUch! in my part, but I have to end this agony now, so tonight, when I visited my tagged account, I found out, that he visited it three days ago and I was like thinking, why he hasn't bother to message me on Fb, he changed some of his information like his location and I guess, now, he was planning to search another woman, now that he's done to me. This is my last, hopefully last message to him:

via TAGGED.COM

I'm sorry, I visited my tagged account and it happened that I visited our last conversation. I just read the first conversation we had and just found out you still visiting this site. I never mean to check your account again, I just found some changes though, :-) you just changed your location to Vientiane, Laos instead of Milano, Italy, I guess, you don't really like your country that much. Well, I just message you here because I was going to permanently cancel this account since I was really getting a lot of assholes here, if you haven't message me before I cancel this account, probably this was already canceled. Anyway, thanks for all the memories and good luck...since you still have this account you can probably hit on another friendship of find another girl who is better for you. I'm so sorry I'm not the girl you dreamed of. But thanks for the memory again, and since, you're still visiting this site, perhaps you can find her here. good luck then. You can throw all the memories we have, it's nothing to you though, :-) though in my part it's really hard because you already got my purity but I never hate you, i never did because i trusted you enough. I so hate myself giving you a long message, but perhaps, I will control myself now to give you an annoying long message, because perhaps you're bored of it and annoyed too, you just don't want to say it because you don't want to make me cry again. :-) maybe, when you go back here in Bangkok, you probably found a girl who can match up your personality whom you can spend 4 nights with and I'm sure I'm not that girl because I gave you a lot of worries. About the seaweeds, don't eat it, if you don't like it, just throw it, my notebook, just burn it if you don't like it and throw the keychain....sorry....im exaggerating really, but, I was so stupid......to have feelings for you when I know you're from tagged......i'm not going to scare you though, i don't think it's love, it's kind of crush....hehehe.....but im sure it will die soon as I remind myself that you said in myself that you will never ever have feelings for me, aside from lust. Don't worry, for me you're not an asshole, because I know you're just a man, who needs a woman. I respect you. you're still wonderful for me though. I will not delete you on my fb account or skype, because after all we've shared something mutual and you're really gentleman that night. Thanks for the wonderful Valentine's date, I will never forget it. You just don't smoke a lot because I do care for your health if you don't.
I love you as my special friend and I really care for you, that's the truth Antonio. I want to hate you but I can't, because I think, you're a good man. I hope you can find the woman who love you endlessly and who will not dictate you, who will take care of you and be with you in your adventure, because it's still better to spend your adventure with someone, you deserve a good woman. I just need to confess something okay, don't worry, I will try not to send you long message anymore but, I have to say this;
I dreamed of you as my true love, and my only love, I dreamed that you will be the one for me....but that's only a dream, because i know it could never be....I just wished that I really have a true love, because before I met you, i told myself that I don't want to give chance to love....because I was broken when you met me. For me love sucks, between a man and a woman....and when you came, I dreamed that love isn't that sucks, but, when you told me, you can not love me, I realized that true love is rare now. I was crying because I was rejected by the ones I like. I almost fall for you, because of your sweet messages and you told me about your future plans, you always tell me, you'll show your heart and prove to me something about it and you will never let me down, but you let me down when you told me, you're just dreaming you love me and admitted it was wrong. you hurt me....and I was not only bleeding because you taken my virginity, but also you broke some part of my heart....but don't worry, I will not destroy my life, I still have my mind, because I don't want to waste my life, I just pity your ex because she haven't realized how precious life is, well, it's not your fault, don't blame yourself too much.
lastly....sorry.....i blamed you, for kissing me hard and for treating me like you love me....I'm a woman, and a woman easily falls to a man who gave sweet words and tender touch. I hope this is a lesson for you, if you are not willing to love a woman, don't treat her so nicely. I feel like a victim of yours.... [grin] I feel like used by you.....but, I understand now, when you explained it to me that night I cried a lot, and I wont forget when you cried in front of me. Okay, I will miss you forever, and this message seems like no end,,,,but I have to end this now. I hope you'll be the last who will break my heart and for me Love sucks, now it was confirmed :-) I still treat you as one my important persons in my life, so I am not going to delete your fb and skype because I don't really hate you. But i don't want to expect that you still want to meet me or message me, because I'm sure you hate me now or if not, you're annoy with my long message. You just found a girl who's beautiful, more mature, independent, Buddhist, traveler, sexy, bubbly, smart like you, simple, not so tall, not dictator and who will not message you long like mine :-) I will keep the grey and blue dress that you gave me...I like them...though, and just to tell you, im not asking for anything from you...all I want is, don't make me expect to something I could never have. My vagina is fine now don't worry, if that's what you're guilty about, and Im so sorry, if that night you haven't reach orgasm...well, find a girl who will satisfy you next time, maybe the one who's not virgin anymore....:-) I do admired you though....your body is beautiful for me...and telling you the truth. If we will still meet again, that would be nice, if you don't want to see me again, I will try to understand....just good luck to your more adventures, and good luck to your new girl....perhaps she was somewhere there in Vientiane, Phnom Penh, or in the places that you will visited. and im sorry im not a good kisser...:-) it's too long now.....nice meeting you and I love you forever...................
as my SPECIAL FRIEND.
KISSED FROM ME... [kissing_heart]
GOOD BYE.
AND
TAKE CARE.
TILL
WE MEET AGAIN.
YOURS,
CELESTE.


and finally, I canceled it again, hoping never to retrieve it again. Before you cancel your tagged account you must need to type the reason, and this is the reason I typed:

i FALL IN LOVE IN A GUY NAMED LUCIO, IT WAS RIDICULOUS, HAHAHA....BECAUSE TRUE LOVE NEVER EXIST IN A DATING SITE LIKE THIS, I GUESS, WHAT I FEEL IS ONLY INFATUATION, I HOPE THIS WILL END SOON SO I CAN MOVE ON. LOVE SUCKS BETWEEN A MAN AND A WOMAN, BECAUSE MOST OF THE TIME MAN WANTS LUST MORE THAN LOVE. GOOD BYE TAGGED! GOOD BYE ASSHOLES! GOOD BYE LUCIO! HELLO TO ME.

too much to stay up all night, i hope this is the end that I become stupid when it comes to love? I m so stupid to fall in love to him...because i know, he has the blood of an assholes....he's the same with muffin....well, hope tomorrow is another day, and i hope i will forget him soon, and if he still bothers to message me, i hope i don't have feelings for him anymore, love suckssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!! and i just want to focus on how to have a lot of money instead, at least i will not heart broken and stupid like this, I will just write my morphosis story and pour all my heart breaks and stupidity in my life. Good bye tagged!! and goodbye Lucio hopefully forever..........helped me God, save me from this agony.




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