kiddo16

NaivetY & ChildhooD LefT BehinD
2014-01-12 23:33:34 (UTC)

Coming to terms

Today the teacher covered on the topic of marriage. Really? Just like what she mentioned... no one ever wants to live alone in the end. Everyone needs someone as their partner at one point of time. Coz living alone is simply lonely. When you are happy or even sad, you have only got yourself to talk to. No one.. not even your closest friends may want to spend that time to share your happiness or sadness. Well sadness maybe sometimes but happiness hardly. Everyone else is busy living their own lives. I don't blame them. And then suddenly the teacher covered on doomsday. And then I realised that must have been the reason why. I guess the reason why I have not met anyone is simply because of one reason... to avoid having descendants that will have to face the tough future. As days come nearer to doomsday, life on earth just becomes ridiculously unbearable. So I guess that must be the reason why that I don't have anyone to share my life with. To avoid me having descendants. Yes, I must think positive. Like the teacher, she is already in her 70s. She has been living alone all her life. Well I foresee that my life will somehow turned like hers. I saw the sadness and loneliness in her eyes when she shared with us how she was also not fated with another man. I guess one day I'll be like her. But well, I just hope real hard that no one would ever see the loneliness or sadness through my eyes. I just don't wanna look pathetic. All this time, my life has been pathetic enough. I don't wanna those things present in my eyes and made me into a loser all my life. Possibly, I wanna look happy and cheerful all the time. To the point only God knows what's really talking in the heart. Well I'm really trying hard to come to terms with everything... accepting that maybe my fate in marriage is never meant to be. I was meant to live on this earth. Maybe it was also to protect me from being hurt anymore. Despite so, I do will get envy of other people. I'm just human. I have my limitations. So yea, dear God... I shall try to think positive more often. Think positive of your intentions. I shall try to be happier.




Ad: