Faith

Recovery
2013-10-10 00:28:05 (UTC)

Recovery

Part of being bi-polar is after an outburst, you feel this euphoric high about life...all is safe and secure and you are floating on a cloud. Everyone around you may be walking on egg shells but oh no!!! you are feeling great and have already forgotten what has happened. After a few days, you have your self confidence back and believe you are invincible. You want instant change and I don't know about others, but I will then become impulsive and want an immediate 180 change in everyone causing total havoc. Then I become upset again saying "Bret is treating my terrible ...all he does is work and is so tired.... he yells out of frustration". Duh!

Recovery means accepting the reality of your life...and the reality of my life is that I am a single divorced mom who does not receive child support. I live with my boyfriend, and we have a business together in which I invested finically and he manages it for me. Times have been fiscally tough, and we have been living off of just my salary and I have been stressing verbally and Bret has kept it all in internally. He is now suffering with health issues, and I now have so much tension in my neck in shoulders I am seeing a chiropractor.

It wasn't until Bret asked me to write down our time line that I realized my actions. Now here I am on the on-line journal.




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