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2013-06-19 17:24:11 (UTC)

Finding Patience and Grace

When I was young, I found it easy to run away from the challenges of life. Easy to walk away, zone everything out, and escape. As an adult, and in my particular situation, I simply do not have the option, anymore.

Kinda have to face things head on.

And to be honest, this part hasn't been easy. I have committed various mistakes along the way, but also, and only through God's grace, have learned and grown because of those mistakes. I am thankful to be in a better place today than I was yesterday, and the years before that.

Because of the Lord, I can forgive myself and others. And because of Him, I can also maintain a proper perspective. Now as a Mother and Aunt, I have some standards to maintain and examples to set.

I was momentarily discouraged the other day after attending a small family function for Father's Day. I encountered an individual with whom I've failed to establish a good relationship with. And while things are more cordial between us, there remains a sense of awkwardness, and I sense a fragment of resentment toward her, still. One sure way to tell whether you've forgiven someone or not, is by whether you can truly be happy for them when good things attend their way.

At the end of the evening I couldn't help but feel defeated. I was disgusted with myself for entertaining old and unhelpful thoughts. But then I felt a wave of reassurance flood me at that instant - a still, small voice entered my mind and heart, reminding me of the great patience the Lord had for me, for all of us. It was enough to help me find the grace and patience for myself, and the situation, as well. No matter how deep the failure, or what anyone else thought. It was going to be okay. It will only get better, so long as I don't give up.




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