Ashley5410

Ashley Thoughts
2013-06-06 04:29:21 (UTC)

R.I.P A Loving Mother And A Devoted Wife

R.I.P A loving mother aqnd a devoted wife a wonderful person inside and out a respectful family memeber and a remeberable person. Its all about falimy you lose them you forget them you fight with them thats whats family is and I stand by my family not agaisnt or alone. Its not a child thing saying oh dog i got your back if you got mine. No its i have yours and you have mine no matter what. I will kill for them which most would. I'm like a leader to my little cousins and my little brother. But you know whats funny they are my leader the things they been thro i cant even imagine the pain they have or had have. But that pain stays with you forever reminding everyday that the lost soul your trying to look for is gone and wont come back and it sucks. Im very sad about it but everyboby says life goes on. And you keep living. But that isnt easy losing a loved one isnt easy to move on ive lost so much this year than i did last year or the year before that. I tryed to pray but nothing happened. I feel like god doesnt love me so sometimes i tell him if you dont love me its fine but you love her so give me her cancer and make her better again, Messiah is only 4 years old he needs a mom. So does mynna moses shiann they need a mom none of them are even a teen yet. Shiann is 7. Moses is 9. Mynna 11. But god didnt listen she still died of cancer. And i couldnt do anything but cry and look in the kids eyes and say i wish it was me not her. Them not knowing until the next day was painful. My tia died on March 30, 2013 at 3:30pm. All i could think was what i was doing at that time. And how i was laughing and watching tv with my brother relaxing on the couch and that whole time my tias heart was slowing down until stoped.................................................... Then i got a phone call and i cryed and didnt stop looking into my cousins eyes knowing that shes gone and they dont know anything broke my heart. You can read this and know my pain and picture me crying when i typing this and it out loud or not believe anything thats fine with me i dont care what you think about me its not about me this entry is all about her.




Ad: