Phillip Wilson

Amazingly, I survived my Life
2011-09-20 00:00:14 (UTC)

1989 REVIEW (PART FOURTEEN)

16-20 December (Saturday-Wednesday), Childersburg/Wilsonville, AL (continues)

(17th) a cold, overcast Sunday - 1989. The Weather was more tolerable than yesterday - at least It allowed Mercury to peregrinate around the 30 degrees (F), going out as far as 39 degrees (F.) - but not as I would liked the behavior.
A Barre/work-out this morning; 2 sessions of ball-juggling this afternoon.
Cold though you be, Eighties, your days are numbered!
And to rush then out of here, I have begun sewing of wardrobe; and I have five sales packets to send out to Cruise Ship Lines. How's that for hitting the track?!

(18th, About 3:21 P.M.) It is cold and 'raw' today; however, Cold is relaxing its grip, for it is afraid of Winter, and the beating it may take if it doesn't.
I a babysityting two kittens - a black and white named Puddlin,' and a yellow/brown and white pussy that goes by Muffins. The tiny felines are Leslie's and Bill's, and I have been at their Shelby County trailer, on highway 7, since around 8:30 A.M.
The creatures are about 6-7 weeks of age, each, and they, especially Muffins, are very curious. Leslie was afraid harm will meet with the kits in their exploration.
Miss Kitty, the cat Leslie had until recently, was found dead one morning last week.
Leslie took the kittens to the veternarian, Dr. Moore, in Sylacauga this morning. On her return to the cats' house, Leslie came by for me.
Then she had to go all the way back to Childersburg to her job as receptionist at the Central Alabama Community College (formerly Nunnely); she had telephone her boss yesterday (Mr. Penton) and asked if she could report to her job at 10:00 A.M.
I got in some fine reading this morning! The weather is mis-behaving - rain has been whooping it up for the last hour.
Leslie had asked me yesterday,, over the phone, if I would take on the cats.
Danm! if the two kitties are not the tiniest I have seen!
While Leslie was at the Vet this morning, I made a quick trip to the Post Office (in Childersburg) and sent off the five Work Forms for 65 cents apiece. I had just gotten back to Mother's house when Leslie arrived for me.
Leslie has been quick to criticize Joyce and Mama as to their babying treatment of pets (for example, force-drinking of water, by Luci, via a medicine dropper). And Leslie is worse! I don't mind on a disgusting day like today; but I have too much to do, for her to plan on my looking after KATS! Hell! I wasted too many years away from the Mime Fields as it is, and another day DOES make a difference!
Although the lillle pussys are as cute as can be!

(19th, Acerca de las once menos veintitres de la manana), 19 Diciembre, 1989, Martes, y 'again,' en Wilsonville, Alabama. Leslie came for me around 6:45 this morning.
Las gatos son bien; pero it wanted establishing that all is well without medication.
It is so great to be out of Childersburg - which is one of the reasons I went along with Leslie as for babysitting this dia segunda.
Hoy es frio - nada 'as' malo que ayer, pero sin 'hope.' Rain volunteered earlier, though that service has been curtailed for awhile.
I shot off a Barre/workout this morning, in the nude.
I could easily get use to my 'own' house for the Winter break; I can afford, but what would I do all day? There is a Boarding House near U.A.B. - I had a room there back in the Winter of 1970 - that tempts me, but with the places I will visit between my weekly Spanish classes on Tuesdays (Paul Greenlee, Jr., who lives in Acworth, near Atlanta, Georgia; Buckles, in Louisville, KY; Miami, Fl., New York [maybe], etc.) I really wouldn't be available for that Boarding House on 16th Street, South, in Birmingham, anyway.
Given that my Wardrobe is stored in Childersburg, I suppose I will have to continue confinement at Mama's house, so I can get it all in shape.
I viewed a video tape of most of my work last season. The ensemble stuff was embarressing - not enough 'punch,' or physical output to it! - but I am very proud of the Spec Persona and the Music Man, both of which are solo.
It is about time I team up with Solo - there doesn't appear to be anyone I can work with. The Circus work would be ideal - I would be forced to partner myself, and thereby only kick out the high-class 'shows.'
As a second possibility, a small show (may One-ring) would offer me a chance to appear Solo.
The Balloon Bandit wasn't done as it should have been - I should have been involved in the 'keep away' of the balloons from the balloon vendor, and got hooked up at the last moment.
Washer Woman was consistent once the blocking was finalized, but a more violent 'fight' should have gone on in the ring.
Damn! if Carson and Barnes don't need a choreographer in its Alley! This allowing the clown pieces to develop on their own just don't cut it!
I have missed so much, and have been held back, because of a lack of leadership. But no more! I WILL! see justice done to Clowning!
I at last became resign to my reputation as a Mime, and realize that I will be stuck with that Pest for years to come, and that it has been following me for years, but I always hoped it would go away.
It is as if, due to time and energy are no longer needlessly wasted on attempting to get rid of that Status that follows me around, I have the strength to be confident, and see life for what it is.
In fact, I just may be so new to Confidence, that I am unsure of how to deal with it. I'm well-aware that much of my cocky ways are unpopular, but until I have to level and respect I require to be followed and respected, I'm afraid I won't have the motivation to, once again, resume Human Bahavior.
Please forgive me, and try to understand what's going on. For I hope this side-trip won't be rough and long.

(approaching Hour 1600); and you can be sure Cold is meeting it!
No, I haven't spent night away from Childersburg! This brief vacation has included that!
What is it? The fact that I am on my own, as I should be at my age? Is it that I am previewing a 5-6 week-paid stay in a Boarding House?
One thing I do know, though - there is a feeling of Freedom that has swept over me.
A road trip doesn't really allow one to be free, his own man - it is a job, too structured.
But these two days have been mine alone! Reading had the reign. Oh, I did a Barre this morning, but it has all been a unstructured 2-Day.
38 degrees F.
I can't allow Freedom to push aside my practice and preparation - those two are clamoring for my attention.
Maybe that's why it has been such an enjoyable 2-days - I stood up to the Trainer, and had my way.
Fortunately, the Cold was blocking my out-of-door work-out; I didn't pull one over on Trainer - I was not pressured to keep on the training schedule due to the damaged gym!
If only I hada known that momentum has to be established in order to be a major player in the Mime Game; that doing season after season makes one approach Mime as second-nature, and not as a romantic fantesy which a sporadic association with the area of work leaves on one.
In other words, a season here, a festival there, just can't keep the Engine running and in good condition.
How was it that no one demonstrated this 'Give-Me' to me? The years I wasted thinking the Muse would continually fill me with fuel, and me only going on shore dashes!
Will I ever be able to make up the laps?

(20th, About 6:44 A.M.) I get the feeling the Leslie is not so 'protective" of the two kittens as she was the first day or two of pressession. Having to take me over to her house early in the morning, make the trip again to her job, and the situation repeated in reverse order in the evening, led her to think about the need for a babsitter. For Leslie and Bill had play practice (Church in Clanton), and the ferrying to Childersburg of me took a crunch into their time.
Of course, Mama and Joyce are the ones that 'announced' Leslie' overattochment, and that I would have my days stolen from me for the Winter season. This srong 'hint' didn't set well with me, and created a problem in my Emotional Community.
So apparently Mama (and now Joyce) have always tried to unnerve me, with almost a delight.
I take all the blame - I should have broken ties YEARS ago!
But Muffin, the Brown and White kitten, is displaying body mal-function - or so Leslie said to Joyce and Mama over the telephone 10-15 minutes ago., The moternal instinct is still controlling Leslie, so I see!
Hace es frio, y conditions are right for lleva.
26 degrees F.
Autumn is hanging on to the end, huh?

(acerca de las 12:26 de la tarde) If one didn't meet with outside air, one would swear Spring was here! The Sun is strong and giving, the sky is clear and blue.
But it is 35 degrees F.! Back off Autumn!
I wasn't deterred from practicing 4-ball, or Devil Sticks (which, by the way, are being trained for triple forward flips), around mid-morning.

(about 5:33 P.M.) For all you history buffs - this Great Republic of the United States of America sent around 23,000 troops to invade Panama, a small county that divides South America and Central America. The Panama Canal make ocean travel from the Allanic to the Pacific more convenient.
Noreager (?) is a dictator, indicted for drug running, and isn't a fan of this country.
The invasion took place last night, and a U.S.-backed democratic president was sword in.
If anyone is interested, look in the books - research Micro-films - hunt down Television and radio programs.
Personnally, I feel the force was way too big - hell! Panama is about the size of New York State - but don't let my sway your opinion.
Form your own opinion by investigation!
It was a beautiful afternoon; the air was so co-operative that I was able to get in a short Club Juggling session!

(acerca de 7:30 de la noche) When the '90's take off, I will take off along with them!
Mariah Skinner (she and her husband, Bob, and me did a Dance Paody in 1984) called me this evening from their Ragland, Al., farm; it seems that they as Skin and Bones (their Clown billing) will be showcasing at the Circus Festival and Parade in Sarasota, Florida, the first week in January, and my services as the third and featured part ot the ballet take-off (I present the Straight part).
We will depart on Monday, the first day of the Ninties.
How's that for a beginning?!
Flip importuned me to come down to Circus Town during the festival and do Washer Woman with her; but this is a free trip, as oppose to having to pay my own transportation in order to partner Flip.
Besides, I would rather, if I am to do a free-be, put-out in the Dance, instead of Laundry Day.
Week One is taken care of! (Don't worry - I will make it back for my Spanish Class on the ninth!).
Wardrobe now must interrupt its sleep for 3-4 days! My heart bleeds!

21 December (Thursday), Childersburg, AL

(About 8:14 A.M.) Un jueves, veinte y uno de diciembre, mil novecientos ochentinueve, acerca de ocho y cuarto do la manana. And, once again, we are surrounded by Cold. Overcast Sky is meeting in the next room.
A miserable, raw day.
This is still Childersburg, and amajinly, Family Dollar, a discount 'department' store downtown Childersburg, have black eyebrow pencials on sale for 2/$1.00. I find professional equipment in the strangest of places!
From the mouths of Babes come a word of truth! as the saying goes.

(acerca de 11:05 de la manana), y todavia frio.
Hell, no! Past! You ain't gonna bother me!
But as I take an inventory of my skills and deficiences, I can't help but stop the film that seems to be continually running in the Projection Room.
The film is frozen on the scene of 1973 (?), in Tuscaloosa, Alabama, when I was a student (again). I went with Randy Humphries to his nursing home (?) Work-Study job - I think he was the Recreation Assistant. Whatever, he would play drums with recorded music, while the Old Foks danced.
I took a turn with the sticks. And, boy! was I ever un-coordinated!
I mean, I could no more beat out the rythum of the music that I could have picked up a female!
Maybe my juggling association has remedied that humiating situation to an extent - damn! I hope so! But, somehow, I must find a place in my over-crowed training schedule for Drum Improvement.
I have no choice!
You read about past handicaps stimulating 'creativity' and accomplishments in an individual's life! Why, it's so.
Originality doesn't exist - it's just that the creative person is all the time reviewing his/her life, coming up with ideas from the past, or compensating for defects.
One's past should be used for Aggrandisement - the See Saw of Time must be made to balance (the 'holes' of the past must be filled in, in order for them not to weigh one down). Instead of advertising the Crevisese and complaining about Bad Workmanship (thee is the Mason!), go 'back' and mortar them up.
The Past - The Present - The Future; isn't is all just One Wall? What is done to the Past benefits Future; the Present workmanship is built upon the past, and can only be judged when Future is receiving attention (at which point Future becomes Present, and cease to be a bother).
The danger of a Repair Job - there is so much I have to fix (for my Past extended longer than normal!), and find I am so overwhelmed with the task! How will I ever complete it?

(acerca de las 8:07 de la noche) You perfidious Son of a Bitch! You are not chasing the Autumn Freeze away - no! far from it! You are combining forces with it, in a cowardly turn-about, and restricting Mercury' upward mobility even more than Autumn did alone!
Winter, you arrived today, for your yearly 3-month stay; but do you have to tease us more by enforcing Autumn's Bad Breath?
Just my luck, I will be followed to Florida by the Odor of Winter!
My youth was wasted by luck, or insecurity, or - whatever. Reckon I can withdraw the abilities as I approach my fifth decade of coporeal life?
Without blaming my Mother? Was it really her fault that my late-20's and early-30's were unproductive and an embarressment?
Give me ten years, and I believe I will be able to make up for those lost years.
Here goes . . .

22-27 December, Childersburg/Birmingham/Alabaster, Al.

(22nd, About 6:15 A.M.) Moon was dressed in one of her better outfits. Man, oh Man! was she beautiful! And she was seranading me earlier, looking at me through the bedroom window.
Most seductive!
It will have to be a window romance - for I ain't again! out in the Freeze for any body!
And I mean Air 10 degrees (F) and less!
Winter, is it you - or has Autumn sabotaged the Weather Works?
Winter, do your best, and see to it that Eighties will depart in more sensible conditions.

(acerca de 2:25 de la tarde) Still, over 2 grande in my checking account! Enough not to be quick at grabbing just any old job! I can afford to be picky; for my career needs that luxory!
This is the hardest Winter has ever hit us - I wonder if there is a presentiment somewhere in it. Is the Air cold now, because it knows I am about to set fire to it?
The only juggle practice I did was this morning - a 28-minute crosshanded 3-bean bag.
Winter, have you fun now, for there will be a day soon when your punishment will cease, and you will be stopped in your designs.
20 degrees (F.), Mercury is trying to colonize, but Air won't think of it! Thanks for the attempt, anyway! Air plays rough and dirty, and people almost of your calibre have lost when they challenged Cold and Co.; so don't feel so badly!
Even Sun stayed inside around the heater as a defense against this Out-of-Control Weather!

(23rd, Around 12:39 P.M.) As I begin the listening to Offenbach's LES CONTES D'HOFFMAN (The Tales of Hoffman), over WBHM Pubic Radio (Texaco sponsors these broadcasts every Saturday), which is being performed as I write, from the Melropolitan Opera House in New York City, it is only 10 degrees (F.), -14 degrees with the Wind Chill in the fight (!).
Around 12:39 P.M., on a Saturday, December 23, 1989, in Childersburg, Alabama, the Sun is very strong, but Yellow - it won't convince Cold to leave.
Beanbags saw duty again this morning, in cross-handed juggle practice.

(acerca de 3:19 P.M.) Sun is still here. The sky continues clear.
Cold seems to have found a home. This is ridulous weather! Mercury refained from topping 10 degrees (f)?
With my policy of not realizing the gravity of my past artistic output, at least I will approach each upcoming project with eagerness and a desire to begin my Mime career in ernest. It will be many years before I burn-out.
When I finally reach the 'had enough' stage, I should be at the final period of my eartly life.
Everything seemed to have worked out to erhibit my Life as an Masterpiece.
For isn't the running of one's life an Art? Isn't situations, circumstances, etc., the paint that one applies to the Canvas/Life?
Now, most just slop colors on the canvas, not caring about co-ordination. Some go out of their way to screw-up the canvas.
One shouldn't waste time by complaining and bemoaning the lack of many tones (i.e., allow physical handicaps, social scorn, etc. to hold one back, to use the inconvienences as excuses), but be the true Artist by making a beautiful picture out of what the colors one has.
That is true Art - creating Heaven with so much Hell!

(24th) Tom Pinch, a major character in Charles Dickens' "Martin Chuzzlewit,"in the fifth chapter of that novel, while discussing a situation with his sister Ruth in their London lodging, said, in so many words, that dreams by nature belong to storybooks; that Life won't hear of such nonsence, but will give one Her hand-me-downs; that, Big Deal! society is the same either was, food taste the same, etc.; that one should relate to the world with the understanding that dreams may or not develop into reality, and it's nobody's fault but yourself, for harbouring such ideas, if the dreams are beyond workability. What is it I want! and expect! I am depressing myself with the continual criticism of how I have handled my life and career. So I messed up and wasted a lot of time! I'm not the only one to do it.
Why can't I be contented with the status I occupy in the Mime Field!
December 24, 1989, a Sunday in Childersburg, Alabama. It has been a cold Christmas Eve, but Winter eased up slightly as a holiday concession.
Sun was beautiful. Sky didn't have any loiterers on its streets this morning and this afternoon.
It is after the nineteenth hour.
A Spanish dictionary, some socks, some underwear, a pair of sweat pants, a subscription to "National Geographic,' four classical music cassettes, three blank tapes are among the gifts I received at the annual Gathering, held at Joyce's (across 5th Avenue, S.W., at 601).
I did a Barre/work-out this morning -
By the way, Wynton Marsalis, the jazz trumpteer, had a Live From Lincoln Center show over Publc Television and Public Radio last night, excuse, Friday night; and during an interview reported that an Artist, even when not involved in a for-money project, must still meet with the Art Outlet (music, dance, writing, etc.) by practice and mental preparation. And God knows I have done that, and continue doing so.
The Eighties have had nine times to rehearse; but tomorrow is the Opening Day for its Performance. And it is a run of seven days. Watch each segment closely, and, hopefully, one will come out of the theatre refreshed and eager for the next series of production in ten years - and those will be even more spectacular and meaningful!

(25th, About 9:14 A.M.) Opening Day: la ultima lunes of the Eighties.
It is a Holiday presentation, being Christmas, December 25, 1989.
The setting is an overcast, milky day, around 9:14 A.M. Hace frio.
Tor the past 2-3 nights, I have been tackled with angina pectoris - a feeling of the Chest being sat upon, or similiarly traumatized. Stress and anxiety stimulates that enemy.
For my own health, and what must be a major part of my training, I must relax, take it all in stride, and not be so demanding of Mime, so at a rush for sex with it.
The Honeymoon is over, and even though she is great in bed, my uxorious fascination must be held in check, so my marital duties can be organized and performed intellectually, not done in just any old way.
But I feel that, backing off from study, practice, etc. - activities to do with anything! - will be the cause for this family enviroment that I can't seem to escape to judge me as unambitious, lazy, and a mentally slow person.
My defense is costing years that could be well used in writing, and futher travels through the Outer World, as well as Inner World.
And, besides, I don't have to prove anything to anybody!
Why am I so anxious and eager for that Circus Festival in Sarasota next week? There is no money involved! No jobs will result from it!
And, goodness! it's not as if I need the showcase to convince the powers-that-be, and society in general, that my act is valid! The 1989 tour, if no other season, established that.
It's one thing to handle each project with enthusiasm and anticipation, but if that anxiety results in lowering health conditions, where are the advantages that the two aforementioned bring?
ITS O'KAY TO TAKE IT EASY! MIME SAYS YOU DESERVE IT!!

(acerca de 6:50 P.M.) Must I?
Yep! For it's about that time!
It's your turn to mediate!
Stress must be kept away from Heart! It seems Stress is always bullying, and trying to pick a fight with Heart. Stress usually wins; but there are ways of defeating that maniac.
Just demonstrate to Stress that you are not afraid of it, and, realizing it cannot intimidate or provole into an altercation, Stress will go bother others.
It appears that, given my years of 'experience,' I have been placed on the Alert List to referee.
A cold afternoon - raw, disappointing; but I made myself spit in Cold's face and practice.
What an Opening Performance the Eighties' Final Week turned in! If the remaininge 6 shows are as intense and flowing, what a successful run you will have given!

(26th, About 9:50 A.M.) Act II - I was wrong; for the Eighties Final Week is one long drama, not a run of the Opening Production! - has, for scenery, bright, yellow sunshine, and a clear, beautiful sky. Ait is not nearly as oppresive as for the Act I.
Time: Martes;
Mardi;
Tuesday;
about 9:50 A.M.
Place: Childersburg, Alabama; 604 5th Avenue, S.W.
"Martin Chuzzlewit" is not taking in this Act II - or not but just the beginning of it. For I finally finished with that Charles Dickens representative.
I can enter the new, promising decade without assistance of the tour-guide.
December 26, 1989 - and my would-be heart condition has backed-off; but I'm sure the Army is lurking just out of sight!

(acerca de las 5:14 P.M.) Interesting! The playwright inserted the Storm-Troopers from Act I, which had the entire act to lay down their behavior and personality, made a brief appearance this afternoon; I won't be surprise if Clouds have a re-occurring role throughout the Drama.
I worked-out with Sticks, Boxes, and Balls early this afternoon; Mercury gave an excellent solilaquy, really turning the Theatre into a Warm House.

(27th, About 6:50 A.M.) Words-reading is, soehow, so difficult for me - apparently I, in truth, have a neurological disorder which interferes with a smooth flow over the paths of letters.
For years and years I have been forcing myself to undertake the perusal of major literary works. I have read almost every free moment, when not engaged in what I supposed to a part of - Mime, as a full-time paying proposition - under the impression that reading for the sake of reading would push my learning, and therefore people's atitude and acceptence of me, to a higher level.
But of late I have come to the realization that his campaign of forcing society to o'kay my membership is inflicting pressure, and the stress brings on Angina pains.
It's not worth it! It never has been!
So, the past 2-3 nights, even though I have so much to accumulate, I have decided to lessen my consumate reading, unless there is a specific point to it.
Just daydreaming is appropiate - besides being healthy, I seem to be able to digust words better.
For the obsession with reading doesn't give facts a chance to be programmed in the Central Computer.
In addition, rising beyond the care whether or not society accepts me, aids my self-esteem and peace-of-mind, and probably, ironicly, makes me a more easily-accepted person (although the latter is of no inportance).
Act III of FINAL WEEK, by Eighties, has begun on a clear, cool morning, Miercoles - mercredi - Wednesday, a December 27, 1989, I hope, will be action-packed and exciting.
It is about 6:50 A.M., at present.

(poco mas o menos 9:20 A.M.) But if I need to keep my mind constantly active and reaching out gor new fields to conquer, in order to retain the calibre of Mime I hve kicked out, how can I slow the tempo of my reading and cramming in the facts?
Which is more important - a healthy heart and body, or an energetic mind? One, I'm afraid, must be sacrificed. The choice is - which one?
But maybe the Mind will get along better if I don't try so hard to enslave it; maybe it needs to work at its own pace.
Sun has come on stage to give, what I hope is, a long monologue, and become involved in the action of the play.

(sobre 5:12 P.M.) This afternoon, for Scene II of the play, I had to travel to Birmingam to take it is. Leslie ushered me to the stage, in order that I would have an active role in the production.
The University of Alabama at Birmingham had the first speech; for I purchased a used copy of ";Como se dice . . .?," the text for that Special Studies Non-Credit Spanish course I signed up for. A related workbook, by the same authors (Ana. C, Jarvis and Raquel Lebredo) was also bought from the Book Store at the University Center.
Over $35, for that relationship.
Lunch at the Cafeteria (Leslie didn't eat; but she bought a 19" x 24"-set of paper for her art classes, that will be held the same days [Tuedays] as mine. Supposely, that is the reason - to get te supplies, - for the trip).
Ballet Fashions, 2018 11th Avenue, South, had the next monologue. For that speech I picked up a blue pair of dance pants, on sale, for $3.21, with tax. It was an unexpected interpretation, for I was in the market for white pants. Even though the blues I got are only medium, what the hell! Three bucks made the price right!
To bring the scene to a close, the Alabama Thrift Store in Alabaster took over. A loght brown tux, for $3.88, and a wide black 'belt' for 34 cents, pushed themselves on me, for $5.21, with the tax.
The coat is too small, but the trousers are fine, with only marginal weakness in the 'acting' (spots are on the legs, towards the bottom).
Damn! if this Act III didn't requiring a lot of particpation on my part!
The back ground for this act is: clear skies, globs of yellow, and warmth (in the high 50 degrees F.).
I should remember espanol - look at the dinero outlaid for that tongue!

28-29 December (Thursday-Friday), Childersburg/Sylacauga, AL

(28th, Around 7:17 A.M.) Act IV starts Cold, but clear and bright.
December 28, 1989, in Childersburg, Alabama, set te stage. Jueves is in Command.
Around 7:17 A.M., as my pen leaves a trail of black ink.

(about 6:40 P.M.) Man, was that Scene II ever sensational! I don't know if it was due to Nature, of the Avuncular pathos; but -
- well, this is how it was. David and I went on a bike trip. He wanted to lead me to a trail that he and his friend Polly Holiday had trekked. It was a path through the formally-Black cemetery, behind Minor Terrace, and along the pond off Bon Air Road.
But what a mud route it was! As a hike, it would have been wonderful. But the bicycles presented a handicap - for we weren't allow to enjoy Nature's acting without working for it.
(At least I got into it - David was hampered by nightmares of what his mother would do it he go the 'make-up' on himself and his new 18-speed bicycle - which he did anyway. The anxiety stimulated whinning. And to add to the panic, the white plastic canteen dropped from the frame, which he didn't noticed until we were back on asphalt, wheeling down the Fay Perry Road. Returning to the Obstacle Course, I had David stay with the bikes, and I went on foot down the trail, in search of the Water Holder. I found it, about 100 feet from the road - the support had flagged, and we never even know it!).
But I felt I was very lucky and honored to be on an outing with Family.
The Family, though - was it David, or nature?
It was a beautiful set and lighting for this Act IV - bright, warm sun overflow (temperature in the low-60 degrees F.), and a knock-out clear sky.
Club-juggling was even involved in the act.
And this third scene - how beautiful it is! Jupiter and Venus are providing the pin-spot illumination, Jupiter from the East, Venus from the West.
Cassiopeia, Cepheus, Cygnus, Aries, Vega, etc. had starring roles, and really did a power acting job.
Boy! am I eager to see the rest of this Eighties Final Week play!

(29th, Around 8:01 A.M.) The famous Rain Scene - Act V, the first part.
Around 8:01 A.M.; the 29th of December, 1986, in Childersburg, Alabama.
In addition to Rain - only a light mist - the stage has been made cool.

(A "Frank and Ernest" comic strip: The short one with the big nose is climbing a mountain, viewer's right; the character is looking up and to his left, and saids, "I Give Up. . . . I 'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO FIGURE OUT THE MEANING OF LIFE! And the other character, on the top of the mountain, looking down and to the viewer's left, replies, C'EST LA VIE!)

Saids it all, don't it?! The "Daily Home carried this meaningful cartoon - surely not with a finger pointed at me!?
Well, I suppose I deserve one; for I do struggle so hard for the Meaning of my Life. Maybe, though, life is not meant to understand, just played around with.
Or could it be life has no meaning?

(About 8:05 P.M.), and the scene had a rainy, cool background. Juggling was conducted, though, in addition to an acquisition - sewing on a machine! So that I may service my own wardrobe, I practiced on a sewing machine this morning at Joyce' house (David and Mama were advisors).
It was $14.01 for shoe repair, at Live Oak Shoe Repair in Sylacauga. My white dance shoes will see service next week in Sarasota. The foot costume had to be souled anyway, with a thicker foundation, before my next major project; so I wasn't too inconvenienced.
The shoes, taken to the Clinic yesterday by Joyce and mama, were released around 5:10 P.M., as Joyce, David, mama, and I were on theway to Quincy's Restaurant in Sylacauga.
Thirteen dollars twenty-five cents - Taylor's Cleaners in Childersburg fixed up a pair of black formal pants, the light-blue vest, the light-blue 'tails,' and the creme 'tails.'
Viernes was rather expensive, but productive.

30-31 December (Saturday-Sunday), Childersburg, AL

(30th, About 7:57 A.M.) Sabado, 30 diciembre 1989, Childersburg, Alabama, a wet morning (about 7:57 A.M.), pleasantly cool, Overcast.
So goes Act VI of Eighties Final Week, as it nears the final curtain.
I await the big scene of this act . . .

(acerca de 6:05 P.M.) There wasn't much of a scene change for this sixth act - a brief Sunshine set was erected late this morning, but soon it was back to the Overcast motiff.
It was warm today.
Saturday had the opportunity, but wasn't able to make a big impression on us in the audience. But, wait! there is one act in this drama! Are we in for a kick-ass finish to the Eighties? Less than six hours, and we ill know.

(31st, About 7:29 A.M.) And now we come to the last act in the Eighties Drama. 31 diciembre 1989, domingo, opened with rain and warmishly cool air.
It is about 7:29 A.M., in Childersburg, Alabama.
This act seals the Eighties, and sends them to the file for storage.
Inlellectually, emotionally I have been dealt with lovingly, given much upward movement with them. I may, at times, regret having diverted my attention from Mime to pantology, but I have a feeling the Muse entisted me in the self-aggrandisement course, so that I would be ready in the self-confidence, security spheres ehen she has the major battle to wage.
Star-gazing, flute, Opera, literature, classical music, etc. - all are the implements of War I was given, and must keep in working order.
Artisticly, skimishes and sporadic fighting happened in the Eighties - culminating in a internecine ambush in 1989.
The Front may be Carson and Barnes Circus; it may be Cruise Ships. Wherever it is, I must heedlessly rush headlong into the Fighting and destroy as many of the enemy - scorn of people, Past Lost of Time, Horrible speech, etc. - as I can. And, hopeflly, I will survive to take in the Peace Conderence of the Third Milenuim.
It's funny - but maybe not. I didn't realize, though, ten years ago on December 31, 1979, that the Eighties would be considering my application for Commissioned Officier; for I don't recall making a conscious, formal attempt for Leadership.

(about 4:24 P.M.) The Ninties want to make doubly sure it has a clean path to start on; for a drizzle, albeit constant, has been wiping the slate clean.
Cool Air has also reported in to eulogize the Eighties and welcome in Ninties, relaying the orders which it must act upon.
A Barre/work out saw the last 1989 day as it is about to set sail on the Sea of History. A brief session with Sticks and Boxes also contriburted to the festivities.
A short scene with Sun Shine, but this Act VII, has been mostly raw and Overcast.
I called Paul Greenlee, in Acworth, Georgia, late last night. Now, Paul and I were involved in the Birmingham ballet scene in the late-'60's-early '70's. And we have communicated off and on since that period, including a Photographer-Model relationship.
Paul is a drug-and alchol abuse counsler in Cedartown (?), Georgia, is married (only recently).
As one of the going- away presents for Eighties, I figure I would make contact.
But, as Thomas Wolf said, you can't go home again. Many dead spaces appeared in the telephone meeting, and it was difficult at times to come up with conversation.
Which only goes to prove that my Past won't to be left alone - It doesn't think it's fair that It is called upon to help Futre get started.
There is really no reason for Paul and I to remain buddies - we no longer have a common interest. And dance was the only thing linking us.
So I will ever so slowly, so I can see if Future really wants and needs the seperation, fade from Paul's active membersip role. Hell! there will always be Ballet as the Tie that Binds between us; but maybe that period of our lives will be more special for both of us if we don't attempt to make it reach over a span of twenty years.
The Past is a weak and dangerous thing that is the only link between two people.
I want to begin My Decade in shape and ready for action, with as least excess, not necessary baggage as possible.








Ad: