The Anonymous Writer

The Journal With No Name
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2013-01-24 20:31:00 (UTC)

Life with an Imaginary Friend

Dear Journal,

I don't have much to tell you. Nothing has changed in the last 24 hours. I mean, yeah I might have gotten annoyed of Shirley to the point where I couldn't even be around here for activity period, and I hardly could withstand her during lunch. But I mean otherwise, nothing really has changed around here!

So why am I writing a journal entry if nothing has changed? Well, why not? It's not like I have anything better to do. My tennis got cancelled because it is about 20 degrees here and this club I go to on Thursdays holds their tennis only outdoors. And North Carolina can't withstand the cold. (They're pussies.) And so um, yeah! No homework. No tennis. And what does that leave for me? Oh right. A binge eating, movie watching, pool playing, bored Brooke. Woo-hoo!

I figure I could be a little, slightly, tidbit more productive. So why not write in my journal since it's something I love to do? I mean, I'll be the first one to admit that this whole online journal thing is pretty addictive stuff. Who knew writing about yourself is so interesting? Only, today I will not write about myself in the sense that I'm going to talk about what's happening in my life. No, today I will just start a rambling entry. I feel as if it's fitting to make an entry filled with a rambling thought every now and then. I'm a very rambling type of person. Journals, like you, are there to display what type of person is writing, er typing in this digital book! So there is my thought process for that one.
Imaginary friends. Ever thought about having one? I don't mean the kind that you probably had when you were like 2. This imaginary friend isn't actually imaginary. This imaginary friend is more like an invisible friend. They are able to carry things, touch things, eat things, speak things, and so on. This imaginary friend will be there with you when you are actually in the mood to hang out with people, and will immediately disappear when you are not. They're the perfect friend. Now, I can't imagine up a perfect friend up for everybody. People have different opinions on what a perfect friend consists of. People believe a perfect friend carries specific looks, voice, personality, abilities, and wishes. I couldn't pick somebody everybody would love, as I've said before. But above all, this friend, this perfect friend, is unable to be seen by everybody else. Hence, the whole imaginary part! People believe that you just made this person up, but little do they know they're real. I mean really, real. They can moves things, touch things. They can participate in reality.

However, it may be frustrating at first to you. The fact that you can't introduce you're perfect friend to anybody else is painful! How are you supposed to display you're perfect friend to everybody? How are you supposed to show your friends who you hang out with all of the time? How are you supposed to prove to people that you are not psychotic? These are all of the questions you would face being friends with somebody invisible. It's just the price you have to pay for something truly magnificent. I think it's worth it. Do you?

Plot twist: What if this imaginary friend of yours became something more?

Now, don't go around thinking, "Jesus, Brooke! You are so perverted. How gross of you!" Quite honestly, everybody needs a partner every now and then. People get lonely in parts of their lives. Imagine how much less unwanted babies there would be! Imagine how much less people would slip back to their exes! Imagine how much easier it would be to wake up every day knowing that you will always have somebody to be with! The catch? This imaginary friend couldn't help you reproduce. They don't have the sperm for the straight girls or gay guys and vice versa. (I know gays can't reproduce. I just thought how awesome it'd be for the gays and lesbians to not have to adopt if they don't want to and actually have their own child, biologically speaking.) This catch may be a good thing however. You can be with this imaginary person for as long as you want, but if you decide to move on and have children then no hard feelings! The imaginary friend would move on, and you'd have the children you've always wanted with your new love of your life. How amazing would that be?

Life with an imaginary friend would be blissful. People in real life suck. Most of them are selfish, backstabbing, or can't always be there for you. An imaginary friend, however, is quite the opposite. They will always have your back, always guide you to the higher road, and always be that perfect friend.

No gimmicks. No malfunctions. Only perfection.

Signing out,
Brooke Something