LustingforNightmares

tumbleweed
2012-12-24 23:24:34 (UTC)

Moments


11:24 PM


"Don't Let Me Get Me" by P!nk

One of those moments where I can't stop thinking

And I feel like I'm falling and it feels horrible because right now, I just... Want to disappear. I'm thinking about cutting some more but I need my arm to heal up and really, that is my preferred spot.

I could just use my thighs, I guess.

Whoever stole my blades the other day did not realize

1) I have more of those particular blades in my bathroom.

2) I also cut with normal razor blades, as they draw more blood and I like blood.

3) They only made me want to cut more. They made it interesting - they made me evil. I get evil sometimes. Scary, even. I really want to smoke, but I don't have a fucking lighter.

I also thinking about doing.... Something else. But... No, I haven't done that since November. Why does it feel like forever, then?

It makes me sick. So sick, yet so satisfied with myself.

Destruction is a form of creation, I suppose.




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