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2012-11-29 22:51:19 (UTC)


10:51 PM

So, I was reading this nineteen year old guy's diary and he started talking about how he was looking through all the diaries on here and most of them were about people who thought they were the only thing in the world and how they were so SAD and DEPRESSED and SPECIAL.

I know it was written in July, but I was offended anyway. I stopped myself from sending feedback because that would've just been stupid.

I don't think I'm special. I think I don't matter, I think I try to balance things out, but I don't think I'm special.

Yeah, I'm sad. Yeah. Depressed. It's a medical condition, actually. But in some sense, I think he's right. I talk too much about myself.

The truth is, I don't really have much else to talk about. I think this is part of the reason why I have depression. I'm a really lonely girl and I spend too much time with my thoughts.

There are other reasons too, of course. But I am trying not to think about it.

I think Aaron is thinking about suicide. I don't know because we rarely talk. Another thing that made me upset was Aid.

We're supposed to be hanging out tomorrow. Good. Today, though, she was quiet. She didn't smile or talk or hug me, which is unusual. I tried to ask her what was wrong but she wouldn't tell me.

Aaron said, "Bitches be bitching."

I'm just going to assume that means someone was mean to Aidrianna.

On another note, Marina asked me once again if I was going to be a Lily's party on Sunday. I don't remember what I said but.... I think I might go. I mean, afterwards I'll probably cut myself horribly and then I won't be able to cut for another month so the scars will fade enough for swimming in early January...

But I want to go. Maybe to torture myself? Maybe to teach myself social skills?


I'm so fat.

I need to not eat so much.

Lol, bye non-existant readers. Goodnight.