wet blanket
Ad 2: - Modern SaaS monitoring for your servers, cloud and services
2012-11-09 10:14:43 (UTC)

Why is Happiness only Temporary?

I've been trying so hard
so fucking hard
to not let my parents fucked up relationship get to me,but it has
I think my mum has problems, she's so weird now and it's frustrating,i just wish she was normal.

I've been trying to stay clean but it's so hard. People don't even understand how hard it is.

Jade never tells me how she really is, she never opens up to me.
I cut the other day on my ribs and tonight I'll do it again.

I'm trying to drink tea to calm myself down but it's not helping.

I just want to be happy
to be genuinely happy, for a long time
But this sadness just keeps fucking coming back.

I can't shake this dark creature off my back.
It's always holding me down.
I'm crying while writing this, I can't help it.

On Friday and Saturday I was so great but now.. I feel fucking terrible.
I think I'm going to try distancing myself from everyone.
If I don't get close to people then I won't get sad if I lose them.
And of course to top it all off there's me. Physically.
I look disgusting. All the fucking time.
I hate me, I hate my life so much at the moment.

Why can't things just get better permanently for once.

Try a new drinks recipe site