Live My Life
On Saturday I got into the house and saw her looking through my files. I ignored this and continued my usual stuff. Then after sometime she asked for all my bank statements. I couldn’t believe it. The same bank statements I gave her when this whole saga started, that did not make any difference and she only used to prosecute me. I told her, she should forget it, that it will not happen and that she has no rights to see my bank statements. She got angry and said she has all the rights and that she will collect all the money I stole from her and the children (this is the remortgage) and that I should shove the statements where the sun doesn’t shine. I just ignored her and did not say anything. She is now saying she wants to see proof of my expenditure. Proof of what exactly? You have already told everyone that I used the money for my own deeds…in your words I gambled all of it….so why do you now need proof, what will that do? Will that make you feel better? I suspect she is building a case against me and preparing for a divorce battle (if it comes to that).
2 weeks ago my salary payment was late so collected from her to pay the house bills, I am getting paid today so told her I will refund today. Last night I went to see my cousin (for my business) and drank a type of brandy I now know I react badly to (as the same thing happened to me the last time I drank that same brandy). Overnight I had severe stomach pains and even had to go and sit down outside in the freezing cold….when I started to shiver I came to my room (where she was sleeping with the kids) and sat in front of the fan and she could hear me (as I was in pain) she asked and I told her I wasn’t great. This morning I struggled to get up and go to work, she left before me without seeing me. She calls me later in the day to ask how I was and then (what she really called for) asked me if I was paying her money today. I said I was and then sent her a mail saying I would pay after 4pm then from nowhere she replied asking that I start paying the interest payment on my credit card she transferred to her credit card a while back.
Spoke to my mum’s aunty today, she is more like a grand ma to me. She appealed to me to love my wife and seek forgiveness from her BUT I should still be a man. When I was born God chose me to be a man so I should make sure I am still the man in the house. A woman and a man have their roles to play in what can be a beautiful union. She says I should seek forgiveness from her but not diminish myself. I should find internal peace, love and play with my children and live a progressive life. If she insist and digs her heels in and does not yield or forgive then I should be prepared to live my life (not in sadness) but in joy.