n0rthern_huf

Life of a northerner
2012-07-27 14:05:20 (UTC)

New to this..

Im Tasha, i left school around 2 months ago and havnt really done much since then. I mean, my social life has gone down hill since school ended, at first there wasnt a problem but it slowly crept up on everyone and pounced when we were least expecing it. I dont speak to half the people i was close to in school, my friends. But i suppose my father was right when he told me that the people we call friends arnt going to be there forever, it was school that brought us together, without it we would never of met.. it was a coincedence, you talk to your 'friends' whilst in school because if you didnt you'd have to go through it on your own! I suppose ive learnt who my true riends are though.. the people that actually bother with me now that ive left, the ones that call me, hang with me and still actually remember that i exist. Theres less than i expected.
Todays friday, meant to be the start of the weekend yet it just feels like another day in the middle of the week now that im not in school. Nothing to wake up early for so i lie in till daft o'clock in the afternoon, take 2 or more hours to get ready even though im going nowhere. i mean the weathers good, infact its the only bit of sun were expecting to have over the summer. But theres nowhere to go, were in the middle of our teenage years and we find everything thst we did last year... well, boring! Even when my friends ask me to go out i find myself saying no, that i cant be bothered to move. I can. I just dont want to spend the next few hours of my life with people that dont understand how im feeling, doing things that we do everytime were out.. Which is usually sitting and drinking vast amounds of alcohol in a small park, intimidating innocent dog walkers and loudly shouting the wrong lyrics to songs in the charts. Sometimes, in the right company, it can be quite entertaining, but at the age of 15 do i really want to get a name for myself? No.
Everythings changed in the past year, i dont think like i used to... even as a young child i was the more ambitious of the entire family, ive always wanted to make something of my life, prove to the low lifes in my family that i dont have to follow in their footsteps, that i can be as big as i wanted to and i dont need to have their blessing. But these days i just find myself wishing to go back to the start, re-think everything. Cause i dont want to grow up, not yet. Its only recently hit me that in less than 2 months time i'll be starting college, i'll have new friends and my current friends will also have new mates. Maybe the way i dress will change again, the way i act, speak, the music i listen to, my thoughts of the world.. it wont be like school, there will be no teachers pointing me in the right direction, its down to me.
So yeah, the past few months have been hard, and the next few will be even harder, but ive learnt.. Friends come and go, its the fact of life, but the true friends will be in your heart forever more. The advice your father gives you, is right, hes been through it all himself so he knows. And growing up is something we have no control over, we've got to take it by the hand and drag it which way we need it to go to have the best life possible.




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