Sam.

Bookends
2012-07-24 06:25:24 (UTC)

what

I'm sorry that I feel this way. I know how you hate me. But that's just the thing, you don't. But I think you fucking do and I cant have any love for myself because I don't deserve any. But I say that just to get fucking attention because I'm an attention craving whore. I don't belong n therapy, but I probably need it the most, and that also proves the attention whore fact. Like stop fucking feeling sorry for yourself Sam, your life's not even that hard and your a god damn beautiful girl. Maybe you just cant accept that because you need to be constantly told that. Like fucking Ben just told you that you TRY TO FUCKING HARD CATCH A GOD DAMN CLUE YOU BITCH!

Your literally so sick in the head. No fuckin husband is going to read these. Your pathetic and cant even hold realistic realities for yourself. Like grow the fuck up and realize what the fucks happening, You act like your the ugliest shit you've ever seen, but you really don't think that and have a huge fucking ego, but obviously its not very strong because it needs EVERYONE'S eyes just to feel seen YOU FUCK.

You need to tell someone.You need to fucking tell a live human so they can tell you have FUCKED UP YOU ARE. But no they I would just be trying to "hard" and trying to get god damn attention. Like the boy you love thinks that. fuck you sam. like its not even fair to him because you cant love somebody unless you love yourself. Now your picturing him reading this someday and imaging him understanding and hugging you and making you better and never think like this again. fucking wrong you wont ever grow the balls. and if another human being could read this they would roll their fucking eyes and tell you that your an attention whore and not think anything of it. Your such a drama queen. Like slow down, your dirty slut. He wouldn't feel that way because you hold too high hopes for people anyways, and even if it did, you would still fucking act the SAME GOD DAMN WAY YOU UGLY BITCH JUST BE HAPPY AND QUIT WHINING. Lifes not that hard. really.

I just need to fucking do this because i cant tell ANYONE. Why. I should be so grateful for everyTHING YOU HAVE.


like who even am i.


take me please im not even deserving of this body, i cut into it anyways. yeah go ahead show ben.
i hope it scares him away and he tells everyone especially the girls he talking to behind your back, but not really because your too attached anyways.




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