Find me. Hold me. Love me.
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2012-07-20 15:35:45 (UTC)

Rolling in the "D"

I have a few updates regarding my previous entry. After spending the weekend with my mother, I was able to regain around $1000 dollars, simply through having her purchase the majority of my clothing, plus a new pair of glasses (Airlock... similar to Silhouette). My cell phone service is currently down because my father and I don't have the funds to pay the bill, but it will hopefully be up and running again by this evening.

I sent an email to the roommate I will have this year, but she never replied. I also sent one to both of the suite mates, and I've been able to have an email conversation with one of them so far - Nicole. I'm really excited, yet anxious as well about college. It really is just right around the corner. Money is always an issue... I need everything cleared up by the first day of the semester (27 August). I've felt really welcomed by the faculty at UH, but I hope I can make some friends too - especially considering I don't know anyone going there.

Since my phone hasn't been working the past 2 days, I've hardly been able to talk to Theo, so I called him on my father's work cell last night. He was of course at home with some of his friends. They were playing Pokemon I think. I feel like he really doesn't miss me all that much. I woke up really early this morning and called him around five on the off chance that he might answer. He was up. So were all of his friends. It's hard for me to say this but I'm jealous of him... his life seems so easy. He has all of these friends that love him, his mother serves him hand and foot, he doesn't have to work, and he gets my complete devotion. I'm also jealous of his friends because they can always hang out at his house at all hours of the night, always get to spend time with him, and can do things like play video games, WoW, Pokemon... I was never one for those sorts of games, so I'm always clueless when I'm at his house - out of the loop. It makes me feel in the way and useless. And with both my parents "caring" so much about me, I can hardly spend but a few hours at a time with him, and would NEVER be allowed to stay the night like any of his other friends are able to.

I'm just rambling... Life is unfair and I know it and I should just get over it. I've got an idea of where I want to be heading and I will continue on that path, regardless of any obstacles from other people. I shouldn't care so much about everyone else. First and foremost is ME. I'm the most important thing in my life - the center of my universe. I will work towards making myself successful and happy and that's all I can really do. I need to keep in mind though that other people have value - for me. It's not what you know, it's WHO you know. I need to keep this in mind as I move forward professionally, and make sure to have good contacts. Utilize my people skills to my benefit.

Again... rambling. I will stop right here and hope I get some feedback. This entry may be too long for anyone to want to read. Oh well, it made me feel a bit better about where I am in life

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