NotSoSadSadie

The Laughter Inside My Mind
2012-05-10 01:47:46 (UTC)

I went out to attempt to enjoy the fresh air

My title sounds weird I know, but that is what I wanted to do; or at least try to do..enjoy the fresh air instead of hiding behind my drawn blinds!
I try to make myself busy so that my mind doesn't wander towards bad thoughts!
I had to give my nephew a hug and tell him how much I loved him and also apologize to him for the way he seen me when I almost died!
I was nervous out and about today and it all seemed so surreal!
I was looking at things in a different way, I can't explain why though!
Maybe this was Gods way of nudging me a bit; telling me that he wasn't done with me yet so that's why he didn't let me die that day!
I don't like being confused; I'm new at this coping stuff!
When I was around everyone tonight; I really didn't feel like I was really there!
Man that felt like some wicked shit right out of the movies!
I think I fried my brains or something!
I'm going back to work tomorrow, I hope I am really ready!
I need to go talk to a pastor, maybe he can help me with some of this confusion I have deep down inside!
Maybe he/she can help figure things out!
Well I am going to try to get some sleep!
Thanks to the reader that replied to my earlier entry today

Til next time,
Sadie




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