Middle Child

Listen. Don't Speak.
2012-05-09 22:34:58 (UTC)

Is there a science behind dating?

I have a thousand thoughts racing through my head at the moment and I don't know where to begin!

Let's start from the top!

I started 'casually' dating "No. 13" for about 2-3 weeks now. So far we've been on 3 dates and counting. We have an amazing time whenever we're together and even chatting on the phone. We are very much alike in a way that we understand each other's sense of humour and 'weird' sense of personality. Lately, I have been feeling like he is the male version of myself, but I think that thought is slowly shifting...

Here's the 411 on "No. 13" :

27 year old man
Works in the Social Media
In the process of creating his own blog. His blog will consist of advice for men, by a man and also help women have a better understanding of men. I also can't forget, fashion and cooking.


Now, I do read a lot of books pertaining to relationships, sex and of course, males and females. I should also add here, that I even have my B.A in Psychology, so it's safe to say that I know a thing or two about a thing or two. My girlfriends like talking to me about their on personal concerns about relationships and casual dating. I've heard from them that I 'tell it like it is'. I may be blunt, I may be too realistic, but also, I could be wrong. Whenever my friends (male and female) ask me for my insight, I try not to be bias, but I also encourage them speak openly to their partner, to be firm in what they want, and of course, don't get up the 'goods' too soon!

Let's revert back to why I feel that my feelings towards my so-called 'other half' is started to concern me. Because of my background and my intent to someday write a book on online dating or relationships, to meet another individual (a man) who also has the same drive, intrigues me. At first, I thought, how wonderful would it be to finally have a conversation with a man who probably knows what he's saying! But as I'm getting to know him, he seems to be reiterating everything that I already know. I know men are more physical and women are more emotional. I know the science behind pain and love. It's annoying when someone is constantly reminding you about the facts. But last night he said something to me that really stuck and that is, there is a difference between 'causal dating' and 'relationship'. I know there is a distinction between the two, but then I started to question, how long does one casually date another?

And then it hit me, for a man who seems to know "A LOT" about men and women, two things, why is he still single and is he using me for his case study?

There, I've said it, I feel released!

He has been saying all the right things to me, making me feel that I'm pretty and a well-rounded woman. Telling me that I make him smile and that I often leave him feeling speehless. However, I know he is casually dating me and other women as well. So when does casually dating other women stop? When you found someone with whom you can relate to, why continue searching for someone else? I've stopped searching. How foolish, right?

I'm starting to feel like his living his life based on stupid advice and steps. Casual dating is fine, but having such amazing dates with someone, would you not want to make it exclusive as soon as possible?! Aren't you so tired of searching, that when you finally come across a woman who understands you and shares a similiar personailty with you, that you would stop and think, "Shit, I need to take her off the market, I want her and no other man can have her!"

Is there a science to dating and I just missed the memo? Is casually dating the thing you do when your writing case studies on women's behaviour or a way to sleep with women?

I need to ask him this.

And also, why is he so willing to meet my parents if he's 'casually dating'other women?

Well, whatever the answers may be, "No. 13" is definitely my case study.


Stay tuned...