Sylvia

Remember
2012-04-16 12:33:04 (UTC)

Horrible morning

'Good morning!' Mrs. V said as she walked into the kitchen. '...mh...' I replied faintly- still being half-awake and that making me slow to respond. Also, I couldn't decide to reply at all, so I just mumbled quietly. She walks over to the coffee and pours herself a glass. For some reason, I get a bad feeling. Like she's mad. I have a passing thought that she'll think me rude. And what happens next? She turns to me and says 'Well, that's rude. Not replying to me. That's ok, I won't talk to you, you won't talk to me.' I just stared at her in shock. Trying to form a protest. Trying to form something at all. I find my mouth full, and swallow. I think she said something here, but I was off by then. Surrounded by my own thoughts. I finally get out, after what seems like forever, that my mouth had been full. It would've been rude to talk had my mouth been full, I think. So I tell her. I say I'm sorry. She doesn't reply, I don't think. I don't think she believed me. In all honesty, I really had had my mouth to the spoon when she said that. She leaves, I quickly gulp down half of the remaining cereal, and away to my room. I think I teared up. At that point, I just didn't know. Why'd she do that. Why she was rude. Later, I think I should've replied to her by saying 'I'm sorry that I don't wake up on the right side of the bed every morning. I'm afraid I can't help the fact that not every morning is good.' I'd say something like that, smart-aleck like. I wish I had said that.
Then maybe it wouldn't have been such a miserable defeat.
There goes my day, eh?

It's raining. Storming, rather. Or it was.

You know, when I slunk off to my room... I kind of beat myself up over it. Over the fact that I didn't do anything at all. I had an image of myself towering over another version of myself. The first one slapped the other one, who was already on the ground. The first one kicked the cowering one. She was yelling at the other. The other didn't do anything but take it. It was horrible. Why did I beat myself up?

~How many times can I break, 'till I shatter...
Over the line, can't define what I'm after...~




Ad: