MinikuiChibi

An Ugly Girl / An Ugly Life
2012-02-24 16:28:25 (UTC)

Flightless Bird

Everyday I feel a new emotion consume my body. Lately, I've noticed I've been having mood swings. Happy one day, sad the next. It's really bizarre to me because I don't deal with such a sudden change to my feelings very often.
I don't know what to do.
Today, jealousy has stuck with me like a bad habit. Staying in a classroom stuffed with 20 or more beautiful girls was really upsetting. For everything I felt was beautiful about them, I checked off a flaw about myself.
Surrounded by a room full of pigeons, showing off the ability of flight, I was a mindless moa. Moa's, a large flightless bird, extinct from a tribe called the Māori, are huge in size and lack in colors or anything else that would draw in attention.
Moa's actually lack wings. Most, if not all, flightless birds still have wings, but are unable to fly. Moa's don't even get that much.
I do this routine everyday. I surround myself with millions of girls, undeniably beautiful, and act like I don't care. Like it doesn't bother me. I realized today, though, that it DOES bother me. That I hate being crammed with the same girls guys would walk a broken glass path for.
Actually, I just remembered that my sister and her boyfriend are coming down to stay the weekend today. Maybe she's the reason I've been abducted by the little green monster. She IS the goddess of perfection.
Hugs and cries of happiness will be spread around the room like butter; they have something to give me.
My laptop was spilled with water months ago. I can be blamed for that. Though it was an accident, it was stupid, and could have easily been prevented. Corey's giving me his month old pad. He never uses it, and it's not needed, since he has a laptop, smart phone, and possibly every other electronic he'd need in his life.
So, I get his pad, and hopefully can use that like a laptop. Writing down the stories that flock my mind. Updating this diary. Watching videos online.
Also, when I go up to visit my mom on Saturday, she told me she had pink things for my bed she could give me. What a coincidence. I was just ranting about wanting a girly change, being who I honestly am, and buying pink things for my bed to celebrate that.
Life is always full of ups and downs. Moa's may not have been able to fly, but they were ginormous. Some even got up to 510 lbs, stretching out a 12 ft. length. Sure, they couldn't beat the smaller birds, who were free to roam, but I suppose even Moa's had something to be proud of.




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