emilijah

Em
2012-01-04 21:26:17 (UTC)

Mmk ..

So, yesterday i asked Jade to stay the night last night . she said she wanted to stay the night at her grandmas but today she would ask her uncle, Sam, to watch her brother, Andrew, and shed hang out today . So i text her this morning and go: u coming over today ? and she replied: idkk ..i just woke up .

so then later she text me and was like:

Jade: im trying to hang out with brad . but i cant say im going on a walk, cause sam will be alone ? uk... so idkk... but i reeeallly want to hang out with him .

Me: hmm idk

Jade: yeahh me either . but last night he asked me a question ..n it said: are we going to kiss if we hang out tomorrow ? n i was like prolly ..n idkk . im sooo confuzed .

Me: do you want to ?

Jade: yes but no . i will feel like a whore if i kiss him ... because there is on guy i already kiss no matter what...

Me: then dont do it ..

Jade: true... idkk ..so we tlked for 3hrs on the phone last night..it was carzy ..lol

Me: lol

Jade: haha . we laughed, cried, talked, whispered, listen to each other almsot fall asleep . ha .

Me: haha ...

Jade: hes cool . youd prolly like him . haha .

Me: lol .

as you can see, im clearly just sooo interested in this convo ..HA! RIIIGHT ...btw ..Brad is her friend she met through her friend Cameron . Brad used to be obssessed with her and she didnt like him back, now she does and he asked her out and she said no . Shes waiting for Bailey to do something but Bailey has liked her for a year and hasnt asked her out . I go: you cant wait around for Bailey forever . your gunna have to eventually date other people . its been a year . dont you think its time to move on ? but of course she didnt listen to one word .

anyways, the point of my story . so you wanted to stay at your grandmas so you could see Brad ?!? what happened to chicks before dicks .?! and then i ask if we are hangin ..and you say idkk then blow me off to hang with Brad and go and talk to me about it !?

im seriously over people now-a-days . like, for real . i thought we was friends . and now tomorrow at school shes gunna go on and on and on about Brad . honestly, i could give a shit less . if your gunna blow me off, the ONLY person you like, let-alone trust, for a guy !? mine and Jades quote has always been 'chicks before dicks .' apparently not .

am i the bad friend here ? am i not giving her, or i guess Brad, a chance ? or is it her ? is she being selfish !? help me ...someone..anyone . i cant loose my only friend . the only time me and her have faught was in 6th grade, over a boy . and here we go again . shes my only friend, the only person i trust . i cant lose her . and that is the ONLY reason i wanna go to high school . to make friends . idkk ..my life is just falling apart at the seams and i cant get it back together . it keeps getting worse .

my mom is all like: whats wrong . and im like nothing . and shes like: i think there is more to the Aidan situation that youre not telling me . and i think theres something going on with you and McKenzie . and i think the reason people dont like you is Jade .

im like SHUT UP ! you know nothing about me . about the situation . just stop ..

ive been crying a lot . i dont know who i am . what i am . where my life is going . who my friends are . anything .

ig im ending this entry with tht .
love yall <3
bye .
em . <3




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