Middle Child

i need to breathe

Diary,

I'm a nervous reck.

I don't know what is wrong with me. I am always nervous and it's taking a toll on my body in many ways. I hate feeling this way, it brings me such pain.
I have my moments when i am joyful and stress-free, but it doesn't last very long. I think being home is stressing me a lot. I'm unemployed, i'm done university, i have no money, i depend fully on my parents and it is stressing me.

i am still with TutorGuy. Things are going well, however he has been acting weird this past weekend. I am trying my hardest not to let it effect my psyche. We seem to be getting along well, but I hope the sex discussion doesn't spring back up again. I'm not emotionally there yet. I hope he understands. I really like this guy.