anne

The ramblings of Anna
2011-06-24 13:29:38 (UTC)

i fucked things up.

Dear whoever
Last friday night was the worst. I went out with my friend K after school. Then in the night we went to the woods, called the Hemlock Ravines. She went with her boyfriend and i went just to have fun. Unfortunately, things took a turn for the worse.
I had a couple smokes, which was fine. I really liked how easy going it made me feel. But then, being the stupid idiot that I am, i had a LOT of vodka. I got stone drunk.
Now note, i was with people who really dont know me and wouldnt take care of me. So anyways, i was drunk. Really messed up. And sort of high. The guy i liked was there, and i decided to tell him how much i like him. Also i said that i gave anal sex to my ex which never even happened. I am a virgin! and I kept talking about him. Let's call him S, and the guy i like C. anyways, i was all over the place saying shit and pissing everybody off.
School on monday was the absolute worst. People were staring at me and i was hearing people whisper my name and look at me in the corner of the eye. By the way, that's been going on all week, too. C is ignoring me. AND avoiding me. and a lot of people who would normally talk to me, just didn't. J, who was there friday night and was taking care of me some, making sure i didnt kill myself, was there though and he was really nice. J is such a good friend, i love him for that. We talked about what happened and he tried to make me feel better about myself, even though that was sorta impossible. The thing is, J and C happen to be really close friends. That didnt even help things.
I honestly dont care about these people. I know not to trust people. Plus i have my friends from back home, so these don't really matter. and i have K, and J, and a couple other friends who even though im kind of new here are sticking by me. Cheers to them.
I wanna be a swimsuit model one day.




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