2011-05-09 07:19:33 (UTC)

My heart is broken

I woke up today thinking how wonderful today would be. It's mothers day and I get to spend it with my family. I made the mistake of thinking today would be any different. I didn't think i was going to have my world crushed by Greg. He has been on edge for a while now, money problems and normal day stresses were taking a toll on him. I dealt with his outbursts, the yelling at me when i called just to say hi and see how his day was going. I didn't expect him to yell at me and tell me i don't do anything. I admit i do go a day without cleaning our home but i get busy with things too. Alanah made the mistake by telling him to leave while he was yelling at me, he tells alanah to shut her bitch mouth and then later says she will be 13 and pregnant. Why is it that he can say those things about a kid? why is it that he unloads on her and says mean things but i talk to his son in a calm manner. He is ignoring me and leaving me hanging, he is staying at his mom's and i don't know if he will be back. He has all my clothes and told me sorry he can't bring me them because of gas issues which is bullshit. He is just taking his anger out on me. I hate the fact you can break up our family because you can’t handle normal day stress. I hate the fact you can use the word “moving out” to freely without taking into consideration the people you are hurting. I hate the fact you blame it all on me when I try my hardest to keep you and the kids happy. I hate the fact I’m going to school to better our lives but according to you I don’t do anything. I hate the fact that you run to your mommy when things get tuff and remind me all the time you can move in with her and don’t have to worry about bills or money. I hate the fact that you are so selfish and think about what’s best for you and not the family. You are taking my stepson away from me because he isn’t mine and I have no rights to him but you expected me over the last 2 years to treat him like he is my own which I did. You know my daughter was left by her father and here you are leaving too after promising me you would never do it. I hate the fact that you can chose to stop loving me and wanting to be with me all because you can’t handle the stress of money, bills and kids. You leave me here hanging, not caring how I am feeling, not knowing if you are moving out and ignore my request of wanting to know if you are. You broke my heart, you broke my daughter’s heart, you broke our family apart and I am expected to be ok with this. I hate that you ruined my mother’s day by telling me your leaving and will be back to get your stuff. I hate everything you are doing to me and wish you would grow the hell up.