z2smith

z2Smith
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2011-04-11 19:34:02 (UTC)

Resemblance of normality

My life is slowly getting back to normal….my workload is so much because since I got back from Canada last week and discovered the email I have had to drop everything and focus on my marriage….right from setting up a divorce meeting with my solicitor to having numerous heart to heart with my wife….in all of these she wanted me to meet her boss….so that he can further clear the air….to think that I was so happy when he became her boss because I knew he was like a mentor and guardian and will protect and further her career…I prayed to God thanking him for giving my wife such a big opportunity….I feel so stupid now….although I don’t think any thing illicit happened between them…but I still think his relationship with my wife was inappropriate and that is putting it mildly….he also abused his authority and power….but it takes two to tango as they say….putting that aside….my wife is so much relaxed and doing all the things (and more) I was seeking during those dark days….this makes me think it was the burden of the lie she told me i.e. who the person was that was eating her up and not allowing her to be relaxed with me…she pretty much said that…..I now need to go back to normality and start my conquest to achieve my targets….in the meantime I hope to continue to enjoy my relationship….but I will be lying if I don’t acknowledge there are periods few and far between though when I still get saddled with ‘what really happened’ but like I said I am betting on banter and nagging as my wife put it but I will also include some kind of flirtation between them…..I have drawn a line and now facing my projects, family and marriage with a positive attitude…….

I want to thank you deeply from my heart diary for just always being there for me to write my heart content…during dark and bright days….I was in the deepest of despair but you just gave me an open sheet to write without any judgements…..

For those of you out there I want to encourage you….whatever you situation don’t be rash in your judgements and especially your actions….this is a cliché but very true….patience is a virtue …search deep within your self and look for positive things to motivate you and focus on that….don’t be fully dependent on one thing or person….the most important person is YOU….equip yourself and get out there and get it….other things will follow……

Love is a strong force….don’t abuse it…..it can be a terrible conduit for despair and sadness but used in the right way will be a source of a fruitful and accomplished life that you will enjoy eternally…..ciao


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