hopelessly bored

trial and error
2011-02-23 14:25:34 (UTC)

what the fuck am i doing?

maybe i should just take my pills and swallow this disappointment.

why bother to dream?

how is it possible for a dream to be so destructive? all it does is
gnaw at my insides, taunting me. seeming to be near to me but
actually so far from reach...

all i do is dream.

i don't want to be here anymore!

what happens when you get your dream, and realize it's not what you
want anymore?

will this happen everytime i finally get what i worked for?

i don't believe satisfaction is possible...

and if it is, how does it feel?

maybe being human just means always wanting something different. i
feel like i'm always searching. should i continue to search or
should i settle for what i view as mediocrity?

should i self-medicate and self-harm?
are these things really as destructive as we view them as a society?

should i find a way to get by where i don't feel the need to do
those things?


i'm depressed but my drive is coming back....

now i just need to figure out what the fuck to do about it.

"sleeping makes you suffer."




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