mr.complex

trading bad dreams for great nightmares
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2011-02-07 10:34:53 (UTC)

ok i got it

so whats the reason for the journal? well prolly so i can get things
out into the open. stuff i wish i could tell people but speaking it
into the atmosphere is tougher than it seem. well for me anyways.
(sigh) i really wish i had a time machine. would go back to a few
weeks ago to where i was telling someone some things ive done that i
am not proud of. i told her i cheated because...well didnt have a real
reason to do it actually. kinda did it just because i could. still can
think of a reason that got me started down this path. she did
everything i asked almost. sex was awesome, head even better, and to
still cheat i must have a serious mental illness of some sorts.
granted i nvr really seen myself being with her forever, although it
did cross my mind numerous times, but i knew this was just a right now
thing from the jump. i was her first, well at least that what she
tells me, but i have reason to doubt her, because lets be honest its
not many 23 yr old virgins these days. but whatever, if she say she is
then she is. probably born again virgin. i hear those are popular
these days. i should have been honest from the beginning. should have
told her i had a girlfriend the first day we met. but i didnt care i
was already one foot out the door when it came to her. so why divulge
any info that could go against me getting laid. no self respecting man
would intentionally talk himself out of some sex, right?


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