Sera L Rose

Thought and Faith
2010-12-07 01:18:51 (UTC)

Single and Pissed

So, my girlfriend broke up with me. Apparently, after months of
pushing for commitment from me she's decided that she's not quite
ready to settle down. To say I'm pissed off would be putting it
lightly.

I loved her, but I'm beginning to see that this break up may have been
the best thing that could have happened to me.

My ex was extremly immature. I lost count of the number of times she
got so drunk she couldn't walk by herself. I lost count of the number
of times she told me "I just want to do what I want to do". I am so
fucking sick of people being immature. How hard is it to man up
(excuse the phrase) and take on responsibility? To act like an adult?
She said she was forced to be mature her whole life....tough shit, so
was I. The difference was I was mature enough to recognize what, in
the long term, was better for me. Partying, drinking....not my thing.

If she doesn't want to settle down, fine, her loss. But this whole "I
still love you as a friend" shit has me pissed off. She seems to want
to be out with everyone else but me. Shes out with her other ex,
someone she apparently discussed the possibility of dating with, and
her ex's friend who hated her for the longest time. These people are
obviously more important to her than me because I've hardly seen her.
I'm so furious at her. Its bad enough she brakes up with me, but does
she have to disappear? I mean, that makes it obvious how she feels
about me....how miserable I must have made her.

Is it so wrong to want to be in a long term committed relationship? Is
it wrong to want to be romanced? To be held and cuddled? To have
someone I can romance and hold and cuddle and love? sure, fights
happen but....but you're supposed to want to work through it....

: sigh: oh well, I guess it doesn't matter. I'll prolly be alone for
the rest of my life anyway.




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