xorinaannxo

Little Secrets
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2010-11-29 02:31:19 (UTC)

Future

Life is always about taking chances and living different situations
and experiences. Life is way too short to try to follow the rules or
keep to yourself. Whenever you don't follow rules, you have more time
to figure out how to live from silly mistakes that you made. And
whenever your heart isn't opened to new people or ideas, you push
everything that matters in your life away.
It took me an hour of tears and a verbal phone conversation with my
boyfriend's mother to realize both of those. I'm always following the
rules and thinking about how successful i would be if I kept a plan
for everything. I had it all laid out; married by 25, having 2 kids
by 30, getting a job that made enough money so i could have the car
of my dreams and a mansion that my husband and I would grow old in.
It's not about the plan. It's not about the structure. It's
definitely not about the money. It's about your faith in God and your
heart and soul that would take you in the directions you will go in
in the future. If you live to the fullest, love everyone, and laugh a
lot..you WILL be successful. Even without the luxuries that everyone
longs for. It's not about how much you have. It's always how much it
values.
Family, friends, and love are the three things that you can't buy.
Sure, you can buy cars, houses, and things that you don't use to make
yourself look good. But would you seriously be happy? I mean think
about it. You buy a lot of stuff to flaunt. To show off to everyone.
But what if you have no one? Then you're stuck with expensive junk
that you didn't even need.
You can have absolutely nothing and still have something if you
didn't have a close mind or heart. You would have the people that
matter most constantly around you. Picking you up whenever you're at
your lowest, or congratulating you whenever you're at the happiest
point in your life.
Lately, I've been nagging my boyfriend about why he doesn't talk
to me for hours on end on some days. I would get so angry with him
and statt sending him nasty messages on his phone, and having the
image of him and another girl constantly be playing in mind. It
wasn't and isn't healthy for us. For anybody.
His mom called me and told me that he was thinking about breaking
up if it gotten any worse. I broke down in tears. This whole time I
was so angry at him, where I should have taken a step back and look
at how I was treating him. He treated me with nothing but love and
respect. Where I was slandering him about not talking. I was selfish
and misunderstanding. i was worrying so much about me getting hurt,
than thinking about how I'm hurting other people..the people that
always would mean the most to me.
He would never hurt me in any way. He would never cheat, lie,
abuse, or just make me feel like I wasn't good enough. He's in love
with me and that's a promise ♥. It wasn't going to change.
Sometimes we need to have an open heart to a variety of situations
that we face everyday. If I would have just let him explain, and
listen to what he had to say, I wouldn't have been in the emotional
and horrifying predicament that I was in.
As of now, I understand him. I respect him. I trust him. I am in
love with him now even more than I was before. When you push the one
you love the most away, it's the hardest to get back. Change your
ways now, before everything else in the future becomes unchangeable.


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