- s o u l

music's innovations .
2010-11-26 01:44:00 (UTC)

because . .

"and when i'm tired, i'm so very tired. and when it's done, it's like
i killed someone."


aaahh, thanksgiving. the day of thanks; the day the pilgrims came and
invaded the indians of their nice, little picnic. but at least the
indians were nice enough to share.. or did the pilgrims just MAKE them
share? oh well. i never payed attention during those boring lessons
anyway.

what am i thankful for? this spankin' new laptop! and of course, my
family, everything they've done for me, paintbrushes, and drugs. ha, i
was kidding about the last part. DRUGS ARE FOR THE BUGS! haha, i suck.

anyway, i had a great day for my birthday yesterday. i didn't get the
ipod touch i wanted, but that's okay. cause i got THIS lovely laptop
right here. MUAH! momma loves you, sweetie! haha. and i can say that
everything else is going peachy keen. for the first time in my life..
ever.. i can say that i love my life. or what's become of it.. either
way, i'm happy for once. be proud of me!

happiness is finally running through my thick, sunken blood.
everything's coming together again! and on thanksgiving! that makes it
even better, right? spending it with my family, getting full off of
turkey and gravy, and just watching the world go by slowly.. (:

but i have to say, i always doubt something.. always. something is
going to go wrong, one way or another. it could be anything. (guys,
possibly?) but it's not gonna stop me! NOPE! go away, misery. your
drunken ways have washed over me too many times! happiness is my new
best friend!

and speaking of best friends, i was invited to sleep over! today!
well, i don't know if my mom would let me.. and i'm gonna miss my
computer. it's okay, sweetie! momma will ALWAYS be here! don't cry! XD
ha ha. and then maybe i can go somewhere for my birthday. i mean, i
DID only turn sixteen yesterday. and i didn't go anywhere.. i'm not
popular enough to have a big ass party with a shit load of people. i'm
no where NEAR popularity. i'm at the bottom of the food chain, with
the little, tiny, teeny-weeny critters that all of the fishes in the
sea eat. no one cares, i'm just there to fill their rich stomachs.

so! my plan unfolds.. i go to this sleepover, we go to the mall or
something, i come home, do nothing most likely, and i'll go to the
movies with my other friends for my birthday. hopefully, things will
go the way i want it to go, because it never does! and oh yeah,
speaking of other plans... (ha ha, sorry for these chains.)

remember that date with ex M? yeeaaaahhh, that didn't really go well..
well, it didn't even happen at all. did i mention this in the last
entry? i don't think i did.. well, i'm just gonna repeat it again. we
were suppose to go on tuesday. obviously, we didn't. and you know what
the creepy, ironic part of this is? i couldn't PICTURE myself there. i
couldn't visualize myself sitting in the movie theater, eating
popcorn, or laughing. i knew i wasn't gonna make it to the movies
because something ALWAYS pops up. remember how i said i doubt things?
there it is. it started raining. hard. for hours. and well, maybe god
didn't want me to go. i'm not religious or anything, but i think god
was telling me to wait or something. or maybe i'm rushing myself to
fast.. oh, i don't know.

and now ex M is trying to reschedule. HA. fool, you can't rescedule
nothing, because you don't care. you're only trying to use me for your
physical needs... i think. well, i forgot how you were. that's why
you're an EX.

but now, he says he "matured." i reaaallllyyyy don't believe it. but
his voice sure does prove it! ha ha. his voice got deeper, yo! the
last time i talked to him, it wasn't near the word deep! but it's all
deep and husky and sexy. XD

HA, what is this world coming to? a new one, hopefully.

anyway, i hope my happy streak continues. why? because.. because
well.. who doesn't want to be happy?


[ Because BY: The Bird and the Bee ]




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