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Sigh... I'm already up and it's still only one one ish in the morning.
I figure I jot something down while I'm up then try to get more sleep
There was a big group of parents with their kids bowling and playing
laser tag. My cutie was there tonight but I got the feeling that she
wanted to keep here social distance from me. Dunno, maybe I'm just
imagining it being I'm a little fucked up by my ex and all.
Or, I could be right and she isn't as interested in me as I'd hoped
she would be. In fact, I came home a little sad. Not cutie's fault at
all. She once said she didn't have time for a guy at this time because
she has her hands full as a single Mom with her 7 yr old. To be honest
I haven't tried and never even gotten to first base yet. I just can
sense that first base isn't there for me.
How I wish I could tell her not to worry, I'm more than capable of
helping her out with her life and her child's life. That's when I did
a virtual bitch slap to myself. I'm always willing to help out others
before I take care of me. I personally think there is room for that
special someone in your life no matter the situation you are in.
That's my opinion. So if she doesn't have the time like she said, then
I think I'll back off and stop giving her the attention I was giving
her. I'm sure I threw enough hints at her that she knows I kinda like
her. She didn't bite so I will back off.
Someone told me awhile back that I was a special guy to have taken on
kids that weren't biologically mine. Well, I'm not feeling all that
special right now. later diary. I need to try to get back to sleep