Experienced Life
2010-11-10 22:21:47 (UTC)

What is a good day?

Well, I didn't get any emails from the Ex. Made the day go by easier.
Work is busy and I got to do take care of a lot of things. My
co-worker said something to me today.

She said she feels guilty because I'm at work before she gets there
and I'm still there when she is leaving. I just tell her I have no
life so she shouldn't worry about it and that she should go home to
her son.

I didn't get an email today from the ex so it was a good day. I think
about this. Funny how life is when it's a good day if someone doesn't
stress you with an upsetting email. Is that what life has come to for
me? tsk tsk. What a warped life I live.

Good days to me used to be pay raises and job promotions. Making love
to your soul mate. Driving with kids laughing about silly things.
Teaching the kids how to fly a kite, play with a yo-yo, ride our bikes
together, lazy Sundays watching TV with all three of us on the
lazyboy. Even taking kids to school and walking them to class was fun.
We'd talk about things on the way to class.

Now it's just silence. Don't know how anyone can like too much of it.
Seems almost like sensory deprivation. I guess the dogs are happy.
It's their rare moment to hang with me on the nice warm couch.

I was going to take the kids to the fish hatchery this Saturday. They
have a fish ladder and it's cool to see in real life how fish swim up
these man made water ladders and they swim and jump their way up.

Sunday was a more modern event. We were going to play laser tag and
eat pizza. I may still go. It's sort of a group event.The group I hang
with are a single parents group so we all know and understand our
issues better and we do somewhat bond as friends due to our common
situation we are in.

For now, it's rented DVDs and beer. I'm off tomorrow but now I just
have to think of more ways to keep myself from sitting down and
thinking too much.

Sure wish life was better than this. Hopefully, 2011 will be brighter.
I'm all done with 2010 and I'm ready to forget this year.