xxjadeyxx

hurt
2010-09-16 15:50:58 (UTC)

im gonna scream until my lungs explode....

ok haven't had the internet so this is gonna be quite a big
catch up, i choose history, art and child developement for
my GCSE's. all lessons are okay i suppose but my only issue
with my new school is that sometimes in my lessons i'll sit
on my own and no one will talk to me at all or notice im
there, i've cried a couple of times and not even the
teachers noticed and it just makes me feel like everyone
hates me and i get insecure about it, i think form time is
the worst though cause i sit next to people but they just
ignore me so i have to sit there for 20 minutes playing
with my ring or my nails :/ i keep self harming to and
where it was just on my lower stomach i've started doing it
on my legs again, but i've got a small group of friends, i
have anna, laura ( i think), sarah, adam, and tasha. thats
better than no one

sometimes i don't know how to feel, its weird.

i miss stanborough, i miss everyone there and i miss
everything about it. i want to go back but i know its too
late and they won't let me go back but i really want too. i
don't belong at my new school at all, everyone is so
different. some nights i just lay in bed and cry about it,
i came into school crying the other morning, i hated doing
that, it was a sign of weakness so for now i'll smile my
way through it and hope things will turn out okay.




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