I Debbie...
2010-09-02 18:40:41 (UTC)

Lessons from the other side of the ambulance doors.

Lets not even go there with pets, family members , trips and
people in my life who have come and gone. Another day and
time perhaps. The biggest change is the rod and screws in my
femur as a result of an accident. Yup at 43 I had my first
exposure to ambulance rides , the OR , a nursing home, home
health people and being out of work as the result of
breaking my leg. Not just a little brake either. We are
talking I am laying in the middle of the courtyard at my
apartment complex for 20 minutes yelling. My neighbor heard
me and stated the process of calling the EMT's, my work and
my husband. I am amazed it went as smoothly as it has
especially with the loss of income. I don't know how people
without insurance or some support system do it .And don't
get snowed under by any number of feelings. So many what
if's. So many lessons like make sure you sign up for short
term disability as work !!!!! And be sure you know your
body and keep healthy. And try to have a little wiggle room
in your finances. And you really learn who you can and
cannot depend upon. Oh and you really need to get on your
knees once in a while, harder now in my case, and thank God
or whomever it is you talk to in your time of need.

And its still going on , here 7 months as of the 15th.
Financially we still haven't gotten any kind of settlement
via our attorney and I have all but given hope of any
closure or resolution in that way. Yah I could have gotten a
letter re not having to pay any bills related to the
accident. But seriously waiting is not my strongest quality.
And I don't want to be one of those people who are dependent
on a health care system especially now since it is
undependable at best. I am going to get a second job I think
at B/B at our mall even though I really don't want to. I
can't rely on my husband to do anything more than the
minimum like he has always done. He was decent during the
time I was home but I saw how it affected his health and he
retreated back into his hole at the computer terminal as
soon as I was back on my feet. Back to status quo of me
trying to keep us from going under and him burying his head
under the sand. It took a wake up call of the accident to
get me thinking about how I treat my body and what I feed it
but I will be damned if he can't get it through his thick
fucking skull. Why didn't he think about getting a second
job ? He has but once ever done that and that was when he
thought his precious storm chasing fund might be in peril.
But I always come to the rescue.That makes me a bit of an
enabler, I think is the psych term. At least that helps me
see ahead of time what I have to fix.

But back to the experience. I really give a big thanks to
the EMT's at my local fire dept. They were respectful and
encouraging. God the pain was incredibly bad. I knew I had
done something major when I could feel the bone splinters in
my leg. They really could have given me a truckful of
morphine more....But they wanted me coherant.

More later
I Debbie