shadowfenix

Confessions of a Thief
2010-08-22 08:51:36 (UTC)

Was she the one

I have not posted anything new in my diary for many months
now and apart of that was because the normality of my life
and the mundane routine did not seem to warrant any
mention.Today though is different, because today I may
well have let the woman of my dreams walk out of my life
without ever having realised who she was until it was to
late.

I only met her yesterday, but after having known her for
only one day when we parted ways I found myself looking
forward to today and then today came and as it is plain to
see it has gone as well. I could not bring myself to say
the words what words these words, 'I saw you and smiled a
smile I have not smiled for a very long time and if I
could make you smile the same way that you made me smile
then something very special would have happened of this I
am certain'.

Alas, I was a coward afraid of telling someone who I may
have had a very real connection with the truth about who I
am. also, apart of me still feels unworthy of having
someone special to care for, to love because I have yet to
start to undo all that which I help to create. I accepted
a long time ago that I would more than likely live oout
the rest of my life alone and I amn willing to sacrifice
personal happiness for the benefit of a goal far to
important to give a way.

So it is a choice between being in love with who quite
possibly was the one, for I do so believe in the idea of
one perfect soul mate for every person who believes in
love. To believing that a goal I have set for myself or
was set for me by something far more intelligent than I am
is just as important as individual happiness. After the
life I have led and the belief I now possess and the
maturity that finally came with age then this goal
deserves my entire focus and mind.

"SUCH IS LIFE"


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