Stephanieswords

MyWords
2010-07-25 03:33:39 (UTC)

i wonder if the reason i latch..

i wonder if the reason i latch on to grg so much is because
im a lonely person ? i just want to be apart of a unit .
im always the one by myself and grg is to well was but hes
growin up more people are wanting to hang out with him .
leaving yet again...just me . i have spent the majority of
my 18 years of living by my self . and it sucksss i can try
and try to change who i am to satisfy the people who suround
me .
i think i should change my taste in friends . its like im so
desperate for companion ship ill take whatever iss new to me
and i don't know . i don't need to get back with him .

i mean hes not ready at all.
i might think he is but hes far from it
say if we did stay together and he never got to
experience a true teenage life . and that's just going
to cause problems for us in the future . i just setting
myself up for heart break . and its going to make me resent
my self in the future

i seriously need to buckle down and have self control
over my feelings . i know it will be a day by thing but ill
get threw it
i just really don't need him in my life anymore well not
like that anyway .
i know ill learn from this whole experience.
but hes not ready for the type of commitment i am
and i need to realize that i have got to understand
thats hes only 15
and yes he gives me the attention i want & yes
hes the type of guy i am atraccted to
but is he really what i want?
hes not ready for a girl like me
maybe he will be in a few years but not anytime soon .
and i know that if i keep going back to him its just going
to happen
over and over and over again.. so whats even the point in
all this? theres no need to start over
theres no need to talk about it
theres no need to try anymore
because its over .
it doesnt just need to be
it HAS to be .
hes not worth it




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