Aeryn Sun

Uncharted Territories
2010-07-18 19:23:24 (UTC)

I wish I had a river

I chatted w/ Dev again today, online and by phone. I stole a
chance to call him by using mommy's phone card. We have a
magic jack, but she didn't set it up w/ an international
plan. And now that she knows about me and Dev, she's def not
going to add it, even though it would be beneficial to her
since she'd no longer need to go buy phone cards that steal
your money.

When I called him, the operator said that I had 13 mins. So
I figured that we'd talk about about 5 mins, just to really
hear each others voice, and there'd be $$ left on the card
so mommy wouldn't really know that it was used. Well, we
spoke for about 7 mins before the stupid card ran out. I
hope she didn't know how much $$ was on it before I made my
call. Our convo was so short. I didn't realize 7 mins could
go by that quickly, felt more like 2 mins. I can't wait
until his cousin goes back to SVG b/c she has a magic jack.
Then we can talk for as long as we'd like.

Dev and I are missing each other so much. I want to not feel
this way anymore. I want something good to work out for us,
either together or separately. I felt a little sad hearing
him talk b/c he said he's been thinking about me since I
left. I don't want him sad from missing me (he's not working
either so there's not much to occupy his mind). He's been
looking for a job, probably will do construction. He hurt
his back in a previous job, so the construction job would
not be good for him, but he needs the $$. I hope he doesn't
push himself too hard.

I'm going to get a job soon, I hope. There's one prospect
right now that I need to act on ASAP before I change my mind
and hopefully it's a sure bet thing. I'm tired of being
denied. And when I get a job I'll start planning for the
next time I can be with him.




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