Experienced Life
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2010-07-16 00:23:16 (UTC)

Thank God for my group of friends

Well, I didn't update in awhile.

First, I didn't get the house I really wanted. So I
eventually got an approval from someone who's house is not
bad at all.
4 bedrooms which is more than I need.
A split level family room thingy.
Kitchen is upgraded so it looks nice.
Breakfast nook which I kinda like too since I'm pretty much
on the go.
We had a dining room table at the current home that I do
not even recall ever using.
Backyard needs work but at least there is a backyard. Owner
said he would hire someone to resod the back so that's ok.
2 car garage so I may keep my pool table.
I'm close to my friends and work so the commute should be
Hopefully I get to move in by early Aug at the latest.

Just came home from dinner and drinking with my single
parents group. It was nice. It feels so good to have a
normal conversation with someone. My ex didn't graduate from
High school and she is Mexican so here English isn't all
that great. Not to give her crap but obviously, the
vocabulary had to be toned down a little when I was with the ex.

Now, life is different. I can express myself in ways that I
forgot to or didn't think I could anymore. I have so much
fun with these guys/gals. I think one or two of the women
may like me a little.

Not be a man whore or anything. It is just so nice to have
someone show interest in you without having to deal with the
lies and deception. Sounds pathetic huh? Being happy just to
have normal conversation with people? I will never take
friends for granted. They have been my true lifeline in this
miserable life that I have. They are what keeps me going and
inspires me to take that one step everyday.

The ex is still giving me shit. Still lying about
everything. Still says she misses and loves me. I told her
off today. I think she may get the hint this time.
I went all out and told her what I feel about her now and
how she should see a doctor because she is nuts!!

She of course uses the kids again telling me that they are
innocent and I shouldn't include them in the fights.
WTF???!!! I told her she is the one that took them away. I
do not see them because she keeps them from seeing me. I
told the ex that she is to blame for the kids missing me and
nobody else. I tell you, she is one sick mother effer!!!

She still talks to me about coming back home. It's always a
lie of course just to keep me hanging. I lie too now. I told
her that I'm dating again. I'm not really but I told her
this so maybe she would leave me the fuck alone.

Acutally, I sit alone on the sofa downstairs feeling a
little sorry for myself. I won't tell her because I don't
want her to see me down and out. I know it won't be shitty
like this forever.

I will be in a new home soon. Renting it but it's like a new
beginning. People sometimes need a new beginning. I sure as
hell could.

That's if for now diary.

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