behindethesehazleeyes

Head strong
2010-05-23 04:40:07 (UTC)

it has been a month.

It has been a long time, and a lot has changed. Lets start
where we left off. Spring break was amazing. I didn't really
do anything with Joana, we had one sleep-over and then one
day in spring break, I don't really remember the night, I
was bored and went on a chat room. I thought i could just
talk to some people for a while and never talk to them
again. I never did imagine i would meet someone that would
change my life.

Austin Tylor lastname, i don't want to but his name out
there like that. He is amazing, he makes me so happy. He is
two months younger than me. I know it could be dangerous
meeting someone online, but I found my one. I love him. So
much. It hurts me he is far away. But some how some way, we
will make it to another. He makes me so happy, happier than
i have ever been. People are going to say i am to young to
know what love is. But I know I love him. So much. People
are going to ask me why. But you know what, you can't
explain why you love someone, if you can, it is not love it
is like.

I can tell them what I love about him. I love his voice.
I love how he is a little dorky at times. I love how he
loves me even how weird I am. I love the way he makes me
feel loved. I love his kindness. I love how he treats me
like princess. I love that he is willing to wait for me. I
love his passion for guns. I love are inside jokes, no on
but us understand. I love it when he says the word odd. I
love when we have are little 'I love you more fights'. I
love how i am 2 months older then him. I love how he is
tall. I love that he calls me 'angel'. i love talking to him
on the phone. I love that he think my obsession with make-up
is silly. I love when he calls me 'goofy'. I love how he
loves shooting. I love that he is with me. I love that i can
talk to him about anything. I love that he tells me that i
am beautiful, even when I say i am not. I love that he makes
me feel speical. I love how he think he will get me to touch
a gun one day. I love how much he loves his dog. I love how
he will hurt himself, and yet still do it and hurt himself
again. I love how he makes me laugh at simple things. I love
how he inspires me. I love how he said he would love to see
my hair with out anything in it, even after i said i looked
like a fired poodle. I love how 596 miles changes nothing. I
love his love for history. i love that i can talk about my
family with him. I love how i can trust him with my secrets.
I love how he loves me.

I can just go on with these things, but it will take
forever to write down. So i am so happy with him and the day
he asked me out will forever be remembered. May 15, 2010. I
am in love for the first time and no one can take it away
from me. I just hope I don't over think this and mess it up.
I want to be nothing with him, because nothing will last
forever. I want to last forever with him 3.

But also something happened is that i lost someone i
thought was my best friend. It was over a stupid reason. But
you know what, i don't care. I am done with Joana's drama. I
don't need it in my life. I put my all in to are friendship,
but i felt like i got nothing out of it. Joana and I have
been drifting apart for a while now, so i can't say I didn't
expect it. Sometimes i use to wish that i wasn't her friend
because I was so annoyed with her. I am kinda glad we aren't
friend's anymore. I think she changed so much that i am over
it. She became a whore and i want nothing more to do with her.

I also was a match maker, I got my sister her first a
boyfriend. A guy she really like. The only problem? Everyone
is nagging that i know have to get with his twin brother.
they say he likes me, and i am like okay, that is good for
him. But i am not in to him. he is a good friend, but I love
Austin to much. 3


Good night my imaginary friend i might not even have (:

-Amanda

"Wise men say, only fools rush in. But I can't help falling
in love with you."
-Elvis Presley




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