Diary of a Lost Soul
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2010-04-25 02:18:25 (UTC)


Diary of a Lost Soul
I have a boyfriend. But he lives in another state. I am
very awake of online predators so I have not told him
anything personal except that my name is Kia. No last name
or anything. But I am in love with my best freinds
boyfreind who goes to our school. Me and him have so much
in common. And the sad thing is, is that I seem to alwasy
be unsatisfyed with the guy I am with. And I dont want to
ruin my freindship with my freind Tori by telling her how
I feel about him. So I'm not. But, by not telling anyone,
it seems to make me want to die. And I just don't know how
to handle this anymore. I am cutting more and more just
becuase of this. This is totally pathetic of me. I NEVER
fall for other peoples boyfreinds, expessially my best
freinds boyfreind. I really hate this so much. And I just
don't know if I can control my feelings anymore because
everytime im with him.... i spaz out in my written diary
and stuff and I cant stop thinking about him. And I have a
boyfreind. This just seems so fucking wrong. I want to
kill myself. But I wont. But I can garentee that i will