EC

Elaine Charles
2010-04-25 00:50:08 (UTC)

marriage is over

my marriage has been done for two years after we got
married. our 10th anniversary was the other day and when
most wives would have a fit if thier husband bought pizza
and pop and watched a basketball game, i did not care. i
suggested it matter of fact. i don't care about this
marriage anymore. i care about surviving. i don't make much
money, have no other family here and no friends that could
take me in without any problems. if so, i would have been
gone. i want to go so bad, i can taste it, but can't find a
way to save any money to do so. not going to a shelter. i
am not abused, just miserable and with a man i am not in
love with or desire to sleep with anymore.

i am not attracted to him and his is a total mess. his hair
is a birds nest and he doesnt try to fix it. he is way over
weight, (atleast a 100lbs) and sex is a real chore. his
idea of forplay is "open your legs so i can play with it."
i hate that with a passion. he wants to rub my clit until
its raw and uncomfortable and gets upset when i tell him to
stop.

not to mention him being boring and the stupid mind games
he plays. i am sick of our sex life or lack there of, being
blamed on me. if i don't take the initiative, we don't have
sex and he is pissed. then he is grouchy and ignors me and
only speaks to me when necessary.

we have not had sex in two weeks and i am the least bit
horny for him. i don't want to do it. i'd rather go clean
something. atleast my back and legs don't hurt when i am
done and i do gain a certain satisfaction unlike in sex. i
am also tired of the constant tug of war with him. he is
stubborn and a know it all. he is never wrong. if we are
not having sex, he can't even engage me in some interesting
conversation. atleast it would be a decent swap. i want out
and don't know how to do it.

i want to run from the responsibility of my grandson and
get my daugher to own up to her responsibility to him and
get the hell out of this marriage and the hell away from
him. he said he would understand if i made arrangement to
leave, but he knows damn well i don't have the money or any
where to go. he also plays the marter well. everyone thinks
he is just this great guy. he a jerk most of the time. my
own son don't like dealing with him. the only time his is
redeeming is when he is giving a ride or buying somehthing.
i don't want to live like this anymore. we just exist. we
dont' have shit, never had shit and i never will have
anything if i stay with him. and then again, if he hit the
lottery, i want half or even something to end this marriage
and move away.




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