La Nena

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2010-03-11 03:43:00 (UTC)

My little world :

I can't sleep. It's back to my old ways again. Days and
Days without any sleep. "U think to much," is what my mother
tells me . But I can't help it. I wish I could just start all
over. Leave from this state with a new name, new attitude, a
new me. Start a new life where no one knows me. So no one
knows any of my wrong doings.
I hate work. I hate school. I hate Florida. I hate life.
I'm not emo, don't get it all twisted. But if it wasn't for
my two little brothers and my mama. My ass would have been
left a long time ago. Shoot if it wasn't for my mom I don't
think I would even have graduated, started college, or stuck
with the job I got. I know where I would be. I would be
pregnant with no diploma, smoking up trees, and having sex
any time I could. I would be a totally different person.
I go into my lil world that I made in my head. No
responsibilities just livin' it up. kissing boys, drinking,
partying, doing things I would never do in actual life. I
think about that all the time. I'm always going into that
world. Just not giving a shit anymore. During work, when i'm
at home, when the teachers talking, just anytime I can be
there. Living life to the fullest, acting a fool, and being
crazy. But thats all "foolishness" is what soon comes in my
head. I snap back into reality. Damnit!! a couple more
minutes. Pleaseeee...It won't.
I need to try to go to bed. I gotta work tomorrow.
When's life gunna change for the better??

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