Ad 2:
2010-02-02 17:22:21 (UTC)

The middle of the new start ;(

I am those people who love to think of the past
I dont like to get along with people whom i dont know well
this actually makes them feel that i dislike them which is
not the truth
However i am lazy to explain everything to them only those
who understand me wont ask too much about my inner feeling
I am not those girls who love gossiping or those girls who
like to dream about boys and handbags
I am curious about things i dont know
I like to seek for the truth and bury myself in the books
I can feel the kind of simply happiness and stay away from
the complicated world
It makes me uneasy to be friends with those who are not of
my kind
I will actually feel so helpless that i really want to
escape , yet i couldnt
I am sure there is always a reason behind everything
and i am searching for why i am here
Things are annoying me now, but i cannot take anyone's
helping hand cause they cant help me
I wont let people who adore me to be worried about me and
the fact is my fear is from them too
On the other hand, I cant find a reason why i should tell
those that i dont know
So i shall keep my secrets lying here, without anyone
knowing about it
1)The relationship between X n me has been turning my
world so unfamiliar. What was that supposed to be? Teacher
n students? or ex-students? It's sometimes hilarious , too
silly to find the real answer behind this. But i know that
if i go too far, everything will end in a blink.
2) My social skills has been deteriorating. I am going to
lock myself in the room doing my own stuff, not willing to
chat with my new classmates. My problem, I know.
3) Can i really trust Bear? It's so unrealistic to tell
all my feelings to only 1 person. What if one day we break
up? I will definitely collapse due to too many unspoken
4) My ALs. My biggest fear. I want to run away as far as
possible, not turning back to face this horror. But i can
never be granted the chance to do so. My family cant even
support me to study overseas which will be much more
relaxing. FATE. I have to face. HATE that i am not clever
enough to get good results without studying. Thousands of
dislike that i dont have the courage to take risk to do my
own stuffs and fight for my dreams but to take the AL.

Really sorry.
Tiffy xoxo