Middle Child

Listen. Don't Speak.
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2009-08-09 19:11:22 (UTC)

I want to leave you alone.

Yesterday I got into another nasty argument with my mother.
To her I am a piece of shit, good for nothing, selfish bitch
who will never be a psychologist. I also have a quick temper
(I never knew that!) and I am the reason why I have no
friends (which isn't true.. I just stopped talking to you
about them). Hell, according to her I'm in the wrong career
and I need to seek professional help!

Thank you for that mother. Now look at how your family is.
Let's see.. crack addict/dealer of a brother, a mother who
doesn't want to speak to you, a sister who doesn't give a
shit about you.. and oh.. friend who isn't always their to
hear your 'tragic' life allll the fuckin time because you
are just too fuckin dramatic and are constantly talking SHIT
about everyone!!!!!!

I should also add... you also have a son who's going to
rehab in a matter of days aaaaand you are a miserable
housewife who has nooooo friends.

Good job!
Bestest Mother EVERRRRRRRR!!!!

I'm really considering moving on campus. I can't live here
anymore. I can't do it.
I really don't want to talk to my mother again to be honest.

I've forgiven her several times. I show her my love to her
and I never get it back. To her, showing love is by fixing
my bed. No, it's not love mother!!!

She's happy when no one is around her. I'll give it to her.

I'm tired of crying because of her. I'm tired of hearing the
same shit I've been hearing since I was a little girl.
She's the reason why I have low-esteem ( I'm not even ugly,
but you fooled me to believe I am) and I have zero
confidence because I'm useless and good for nothing.

I'll leave you... trust me... I want to.

I need to talk to my father about this. I'm not happy being
here. I spend my days locked up in my room because I don't
want to see her.

I just wish money wasn't everything, but it is.