Most Awkward Situation in my Life
there's this great calvin & hobbes cartoon where calvin says
to hobbes: "I thought I had a great idea today, but it never
really took off. In fact, it didn't even get on the runway.
I guess you could say it exploded in the hangar." only that
happens to me when i'm in law school, so i'm standing there
like an idea while the professor tries to bail me out.
but definitely the most awkward incident involved a shirt i
owned. you see, i'm a big proponent of not paying for
clothing so i love free t-shirts. in fact, if you knew
anything about me you'd know that the best gift you could
get me is a funny shirt.
so my buddy dave got me a shirt from The Office which reads:
"Assistant to the Regional Manager." if you watch the show
you get the joke, if you don't watch that show, then i just
can't help you.
so anyways, there i was just minding my own business in my
legal intern cubicle when all of a sudden the CFO pops his
head in. "i need you in on a meeting, NOW!" so i sit there
and say, "ummmm, i'm not really dressed appropriately."
"it doesn't matter," he looked hurriedly towards the
conference room,"i need you there now."
now let me tell you about our CFO, he is the baddest mother
fucker in town. i mean he just doesn't give a shit. i love
bringing in a vendor's negotiation attempt on the financial
terms. he'll always snort and shake his hand sarcastically,
so i get into the meeting room and there's a pudgy looking
50 year old and a spry looking 30 year old. both were
wearing nice suits and so was everyone else (there were a
total of 5 people now, the two of them, me, our CFO and some
person who worked in accounting who i have no clue what she
does) except for me. so i slouched down a bit in my chair,
which probably didn't help the already juvenile look i was
our cfo, starts the intro:
"nick, this is trevor CFO, and paul, the assitant regional
manager." he pointed to each person seriatim. i looked
past pudgy 50 year old paul, the assistant regional manager,
and found that our CFO was finally getting it.
plus, paul, also had this badge that all vistors get so it read:
Assistant Regional Manager
i felt so awkward shaking his hand, and at that moment our
CFO started cracking up. now i told you this man doesn't
give a fuck, but he just started laughing out loud. huge
guffaws, which awfully turned into halted sobs of
laughter...and just as he thought that he was regaining
control, he even sought to coax the awkwardness out of the
room by saying, "sorry, it's just been a lo...hahahahaha."
and with that he had to leave.
of course wthe two of us remaining had absolutely nothing to
say to these guys so we sat there awkwardly together for at
least 5 mins until our CFO came back with some water.
that, is the most awkward situation of my life.