YK's Feeling Trips
2009-05-21 02:12:51 (UTC)

Am I too selfish?

I don't know what's the point I am being in the school
library, studying for the exam and not going to my lovely
home.... The reason for this is...I don't want to be in
the house with dorothy. She is such a bitch! I mean! REAL
BITCH!!!! Staying with her gave me a lot of pressure!
Everytime when she is in my house, she talks about all
these fucking bull shit about her relative. You know what,
I don't really care with those mean relative that you are
staying with. The only thing I care about is you staying
at my place and being so mean to me. What is this mean
for? well~ it's actually about the way she talk to me. For
example, today I asked her about the facial money that she
owed my mother and she said she paid all that up already.
I said fine. And then she asked me, did you write down how
much I pay for the grocercy last time. I immediately
thought, what? are you counting that? yes, we ate that
together. But have you ever think about how much I pay for
the rent and how much resources you are using at my place.
I am not even counting that! Those small number that you
paid for the dinner, is that a big deal compare to my rent
and all the utilities? Shit! DAMN you! YOU FUCKING MEAN
It has been the ever worst thing that I meet you and
transfer to this fucking school with you. I mean, I really
regret about it!!!!! I wish I have never know you or meet
you~ that would make my life much better. At least I won't
be like this sad. I have been in the bad mood for quite a
long time. Not only about this. About all this shit you
did to me. Why am I suppose to lend you this much money?
Am I your father? and everytime when I ask you to pay me
back, you are giving me the same answer. I got no money
and I will pay you back after I found a job. HELL know you
are looking for job so "SERIOUSLY"!!! With more money I am
lending to you.I found myself more depress. It's been an
year now...and you are still owing me $300something..I am
only a student and the money that I lend you is actually
all from my father. Sorry father, I meet such a bad friend
ever and makes your moeny gone no where buy to the deep
I cried so many time about it. I mean.REAL CRY! Today
after she left for lunch, I can't hold myself anymore! I
hit the wall, I shout, and I cry out loud. I need some way
to relieve myself. I need to go somewhere without her. I
need to stay away from her. One thing I really want to
tell her. Go fuck with your damn make up and your damn
contact lens.You looks so bad without all this fake stuff.
I hope one day there would be a people who can tell you
about this and let you realize how fake is yourself. Try
not act so normal~ ok? you are really abnormal as your
mother told you! What your mom said is actually right.
Your point of view is like someone from the mental
hospital. I HATE you! I wish I could never need to talk to
you and be in "your" world! GO FUCK YOURSELF!
Gosh!I can't stop typing all these shit you did to me.
You always forgot about something. The only thing you
could remember is thing about yourself. Remember in
Seattle, when you call from HK and tell me you have
overdraw your account and told me to insert money for you.
And when I told you about this, you act like you are so
suprise you did that and I feel like you did not even
remember how much I had help you before. BITCH! I wish YOU
COULD GO TO HELL~ Get lung cancer with your fucking
cigarette! Don't you ever dare to smoke @ my place, I
would kill you! I don't want my lovely home to be polluted
by your dirty cigarette. Don't use my home as a place you
escape from your hell. It's your responsibility to move
out as soon as possible. I told you before, go move out
fastly so you don't have to stay with those fucking
relative. You are being lazy, doing nothing and you
deserve suffering from them! 哼!

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