Jack's Twisted Kingdom
2008-12-27 00:44:12 (UTC)

The End of 2008? thank god


So. I'm just waiting for the year to end, it's symbolic if
anything for it to end, and then next year will be better
right? it should be.. maybe. one can hope.

My cousins who barely spoke to me before my mom died, have
now, all completely been silent. So, essentially, I have no
family left but my grandpapa, who can barely hear anything
that I can't phone him because he can't hear me speaking to
him and he gets frustrated. My step grandmother has been,
we'll go with better, than the last 20 years, so that's
something, but you can bet that I'll hear nothing from her
any of her side of the step-aunt/uncle's side of the family.

All of this of course is simply the by product of my mother,
and the whole black sheep effect she thrust on us, and by
proxy, me. I don't know them, really, at all. And well, now
I really won't ever.

On top of all this, Maus was taken to someone's house so
she'd be taken care of, apparently she's doing well, which
is good, I really don't want to move her across country,
she's just so old now, it'd be completely unfair, and I
don't want to be responsible for killing her. I think I'd
end up far more upset about everything, my mom, Inky, and
then Maus. I'm just waiting for the phone call about my
Grandpapa getting sick and being in the hospital. fuck would
that suck.

I'm really quite lonely, I don't know anyone here, and I
don't get out much. I've had 2 dates in 6 months, and both
were awful, well, one wasn't too bad, but she just had no
fire, no passion for anything, and really no chemistry
between the two of us.

So. 2008 has basically been; Death, and Loneliness.

One can hope 2009 will invert.

I'm going to try being optimistic.

on the plus side, I did meet this one girl, and I really
like her so far, she smiles a whole lot, and I like it.
Maybe she'll like me.

Try a free new dating site? Short sugar dating